Persuasive Coaching: Ask the Right Questions
A good coach is a lot like a good salesperson. A good salesperson never makes you feel pressured or sold. Using a combination of questions and a conversational tone a good salesperson helps the prospective customer uncover their needs. Next, the salesperson engages the prospective customer so he or she sees the right service or product to meet their needs.
In a similar way, a good coach will have a conversation where lots of questions are asked so the person being coached – the coachee – feels like they came up with the solution to their challenges.
People who self-generate their own ideas will always be more committed to them than ideas that come from being told what to do. Dale Carnegie, author of How to Win Friends and Influence People, clearly understood this when he encouraged readers to, “Let the other person feel the idea is theirs.”
Why is this approach so effect? Because of Robert Cialdini’s principle of consistency. The psychological principle tells us people feel internal psychological pressure as well as external social pressure to be consistent in what they say and do.
As little pleasure seekers and pain avoiders humans work hard to make sure their words and deeds line up. When we do what we say we’ll do we feel better about ourselves. We also look better to others when we consistently keep our word. Both are strong motivators of behavior.
Being more committed to whatever solution the person being coached comes up with isn’t the only benefit of asking good questions. Asking questions and engaging in dialog also helps shape the coachee’s thinking. The more they learn to critically think and solve their own problems the more self-sufficient they become. That independence usually means they can make more decisions and do so faster.
If you’ve raised kids you know how important it is to help them develop their thinking because mom and dad won’t always be around to answer questions. The same can be said of a coach.
I’ll close with a quote from Tom Hopkins, author of How to Master the Art of Selling. Tom tells audiences, “When you say it they doubt it but when they say it they believe it.” Ask the right questions and the person you’re coaching will believe in the answers they come up with, be more committed to their ideas, and will have learned how to solve their own problems.
Do you have any video of that? I’d like to find out some additional information.
Appreciating the hard work you put into your blog
and in depth information you offer. It’s nice to come across a
blog every once in a while that isn’t the same out of date rehashed information. Wonderful
read! I’ve bookmarked your site and I’m adding your RSS
feeds to my Google account.
I agree with your exposition on the exploratory and powerful questions Mr. Ahearn. Great article!
Hi there to every one, the contents present at
this web page are truly awesome for people knowledge, well,
keep up the good work fellows.
Hi there very cool blog!! Man .. Excellent .. Amazing .. I’ll bookmark your blog and
take the feeds additionally? I’m happy to find a lot of helpful
information here within the publish, we need develop extra techniques on this
regard, thanks for sharing. . . . . .