Tag Archive for: authority

Dress for Persuasion Success

/0 Comments/by

There’s an old saying you’re probably familiar with – Dress for Success. I can remember hearing that when I graduated from college and entered the business world more than 25 year ago. The basic premise was encouraging you to dress the part and feel the part. In other words, dress like a successful CEO and you’ll carry yourself like one, and then maybe, just maybe one day you’ll be a successful CEO.

That’s not bad advice because a study of persuasion confirms that dressing the part goes a long way when it comes to authority. The principle of authority tells us people defer to those who are viewed as experts and those who possess specialized knowledge. In times of uncertainty the power of authority is magnified greatly.
One way people make quick decisions about a person comes through something known as the “trappings of success.” Think about this picture for just a moment – a man wearing a well tailored navy blue suit, pressed white shirt with a power tie, a Rolex watch, gold pen and polished wing tipped shoes. Would you assume that man is successful? Most people do. The rapid thoughts that lead to that conclusion might go something like this – That’s an expensive looking suit, he probably paid someone polish those shoes, that’s definitely an expensive watch. He must have money or make a lot of money. He might be a VP or CEO.
Maybe those aren’t your exact thoughts but you know what I mean. Despite mom telling is to never judge a book by its cover we do make judgments about people based on dress. Expensive = Money = Success.
Several months ago Cathrine Moestue wrote about this and I’ve decided to reinforce the concept because of something that caught my attention a few weeks prior to her post. I’d left a restaurant after lunch wearing a nice sports coat and slacks. As I waited at the cross walk I looked left and right and saw no cars were coming so I crossed even though the signal flashed the don’t walk sign. There were two men casually dressed on the other side of the street who clearly had no intentions of crossing. However, as the saw me cross they had a momentary look that told me there were now contemplating doing the same. Seconds later it was evident they took my actions as their cue because they too crossed against the light.
They might deny they did so because I was well dressed as would most people. After all, what does wearing a suit have to do with persuading people to jaywalk? To test the theory about dress impacting authority and people’s actions, some social scientists arranged for a man to cross the street against the light and watched to see how many people would follow his lead over the course of a day. The man was dressed in casual attire one day and on another day they performed the same experiment only this time the man crossing against the light wore a suit.
Here’s the result – 350% more people took a cue from the man in the suit and jaywalked, breaking the law. You can literally say they followed suit when he was in a suit! I found it interesting that the two men I saw took their cue from me when I was dressed very business-like.
It needs to be stated that a suit may not always be the right attire to persuade because the audience needs to be considered. I work for an insurance company and one product we sell is farm insurance. The manager of that department rightly shared once that a company representative visiting a farm in a suit would not have as much credibility as the representative who dressed more like the farmer. Likewise, a tuxedo might indicate money but no one wears a tux to the office.
When considering your audience you want them to have a connection with you so dressing in a similar manner but one step up can assure you get the benefit of that bonding and an air of authority. If you happen to be overdressed you can usually find ways to tone it down a bit – like removing a tie or coat – but if you’re underdressed it’s hard, sometimes impossible to recover.
So here’s my persuasion advice: next time you go to an important meeting or presentation make sure you get the full benefit of authority by making the right choice of clothing. Doing so will add to your persuasive abilities but failing to do this might just be the reason you hear “No” instead of “Yes.”

Brian, CMCT
influencepeople 
Helping You Learn to Hear “Yes”.

Finding Another Gear

/2 Comments/by

I was out for an early morning walk not too long ago and was startled when a big German Shepherd came running straight at me. It was apparent he didn’t want to play so I raised my hands to get ready for the inevitable when suddenly his owner appeared, called his name, and the dog turned back to his house.

The incident got my heart rate going and reminded me of a similar situation when I was in college. During the summer I worked at a golf course which was about 10 miles from my home. I didn’t have regular access to a car so I rode my bike to work most days. Riding home was a little dangerous because quite often I was riding around 10 or 11 at night on some very busy roads and a few that were not well lit.
Because riding at night wasn’t safe I tried to get home as quickly as possible. I made a game of it, setting a goal to always ride home faster than the night before. I tell you that so you’ll know I was pushing myself hard the whole time I rode. In fact, like most people who push themselves, I didn’t think I could go any faster every time I rode home. My perspective changed one night when I heard a large dog barking and it sounded really close! I was amazed at how much more I could push myself and at how fast I could ride when I summoned all my energy. It was as if all of a sudden I found a new gear!
So what does this have to do with influence? As I thought about the bike riding incident so long ago it made me think about teaching people influence. I believe most people work hard most of the time. They probably convince themselves they can’t work any harder or longer, much like I convinced myself I couldn’t ride any faster.
While I found I could ride faster, unfortunately my extra effort couldn’t be sustained for long because of muscle fatigue. The same thing applies at work. Although we can always work harder in any given moment, or longer some days, we can’t do so indefinitely or else burnout sets in.
Not to worry because I have good news for you! You don’t always have to work harder or longer to get better results. When you tap into scientifically proven ways to communicate you will get better results by weaving persuasion into what you’re already doing. That’s right; you don’t have to come up with a new sales process, new marketing campaign or any other new endeavor to take advantage of the science of influence. Just look at what you’re currently doing with your communication and see where you can apply the science of influence. I’ll give you a few personal examples.
Voicemail – I incorporate a branding message at the beginning of my message and use consensus in the middle when I say “I’m probably on the phone helping another customer.” The last thing you want is for people to hear, “I’m probably in a meeting or away from my desk.”
Email – My autosignature has my title and designations which is an application of the principle of authority. I also use my picture when I’m dealing with new people because a photo creates familiarity which taps into the liking principle.
Marketing – We regularly send marketing material to prospective insurance agencies in hopes of signing them up with State Auto. When we started alerting those prospects about our agency appointment goal, and where we were relative to that goal – an application of scarcity – we saw a noticeable uptick in agents responding to our marketing emails. Those extra communications become our opportunity to sell the merits of our company.
Each of those examples are probably the kinds of things you’re currently doing in your business. However, if you’re like me before I learned about persuasion, then you’re probably missing out on some golden opportunities that are right in front of you.
There’s a time and place for working harder and longer hours because success comes through hard work and a little luck at times. On the flip side there are also times when we need to slow down and work less because we can’t maintain the hectic pace all the time. Whether you’re in the phase of longer hours and harder work or a slower time, if you ethically employ the scientifically proven principles of influence you will get significantly better results immediately; finding another gear so to speak. I’m confident of this because science and personal experience back me up on it.
Brian, CMCT
influencepeople 
Helping You Learn to Hear “Yes”.

What Happens To Your Brain When You Are Being Influenced?

/0 Comments/by

The science of influence is just that – science. When I talk about influence I’m not sharing someone’s good advice because all too often that advice might not have any application for you. For example, Donald Trump can tell you things he does to close the deal and those techniques might work for one reason, because he’s Donald Trump. Without the Trump name his good advice might be worthless for you.

When I share influence and persuasion with people, what I share is based on more than five decades of scientific studies done by social psychologists and behavior economists. Based on their studies and understanding of human psychology, if you apply their findings ethically and correctly you will see an increase in people saying “Yes” to your requests.
To highlight the science, when I spoke at The Ohio State University earlier this year I shared the results from a brain scan done on two dozen college students who were presented with information from an authority. I used this example because it illustrates the reality that physiological things happen to people. Click on the video below to watch a three minute clip and learn more about the impact persuasion has on people’s brains.

If you’ve viewing this by email click here for the video.
Are you looking for a keynote speaker, training, or consulting on how to apply scientifically proven principles of influence to your sales, marketing, management or leadership?  If so, reach out to me (BFA654@gmail.com or 614.313.1663) and we’ll talk about your specific needs. 
Brian, CMCT 
influencepeople 
Helping You Learn to Hear “Yes”.

Why Selling Still Matters

/1 Comment/by

It’s 5:30 a.m. and I’m already fired up! No, it’s not the three cups of Starbucks or the fact that my workout is done that has me going, it’s an article I just read, To Increase Revenue Stop Selling. The article opens with, “Creating or expanding business relationships is not about selling – it’s about establishing trust, rapport, and value creation without selling.”

I don’t disagree with the need to establish trust and rapport. When I teach persuasion workshops we focus quite a bit on two principles that address these. Robert Cialdini’s principle of authority stresses the need for trust and expertise. After all, would you want to deal with an expert you can’t trust? Of course not.

When it comes to rapport, that is facilitated by the liking principle. As Jeffery Gitomer says, “All things being equal, people want to do business with their friends. All things not being so equal, people still want to do business with their friends.” Friendship and likability are huge! We’ll see how important likability is in the upcoming election because I can’t think of a time when the more likable candidate didn’t win the presidency.

So I’m onboard with the need to be a trusted and well liked advisor but that’s not nearly enough. I’ll give a perfect example. Many years ago at my company we had a large project under way working with an outside consulting firm in an effort to stimulate more sales growth. We were highly profitable but sales lagged compared to our peer group competitors. The consultants met with our agents face-to-face, conducted phone interviews and administered an online survey. Our survey participation was off the charts and one of the consultants said, “We’ve never worked with a company where the client has had so much affection for the company. Your agents love you.” Did you catch that – affection and love?
We were a trusted advisor with excellent relationships and sales stunk. I said to one consultant, “We’re like the girl everybody likes but no one asks to the dance.” Trust and likability were not translating into sales.
I’m not sure how the author missed this point but value creation is selling. He wrote, “It’s time for companies to realize that consumers have become very savvy and very demanding.
Today’s consumer (B2B or B2C) does their homework, is well informed, and buys…they are not sold.” I have no disagreement with people hating to be sold but loving to buy. That said, however, today’s consumers are not as sophisticated as people think. Sure, they go online and “research” but you know what most of that amounts to? Price shopping.
Consider this; when telephones and the Yellow Pages were the norm, don’t you think there were people writing articles about how sophisticated consumers had become because they could call around and find out about products with ease? You bet there were!   What I’ve seen for more than 25 years in the insurance industry is people calling around to get the cheapest price the vast majority of the time. And so it is today when people “research” online. The majority are simply looking for the lowest price.
Value creation is about sharing why the price you’re asking is worth it. According to Brian Tracy, author of Advanced Selling Strategies, “Selling is the process of persuading a person that your product or service is of greater value to him than the price you’re asking for it.”
And here’s another interesting point that Steve Jobs showed us – sometimes people don’t know what they want or need. None of us had a clue about the iPod, iPhone or iPad until Jobs created them. Selling sometimes entails pointing out things the consumer might not have thought of. A good salesperson can fall back on the experience of other clients to point out features and benefits the prospective customer might not have considered.
The older I get the more I appreciate the basics. We don’t need grapefruit or Hollywood diets to lose weight, we just need to eat sensibly from the four food groups. We don’t need Madonna or Sylvester Stallone’s latest workouts to be fit; just get to the gym consistently and do some cardio work while you’re there. And we certainly don’t need the latest 10 step sales process that’s guaranteed to make sales skyrocket. Salespeople need to do the basics well – listen more than you talk, ask good questions to uncover needs, care about your client personally and professionally, know your products – how they differ from the competition and how they can help your client, understand how to ethically persuade, and don’t be afraid to ask for the sale.
Do people want to be sold? No. Do they want to work with people they trust and like? Absolutely. Can you get away without selling? Give it a try and soon you’ll be looking for a new career.
Brian, CMCT
influencepeople 
Helping You
Learn to Hear “Yes”.

Maximizer or Satisficer: Does it Make a Difference?

/0 Comments/by

Remember when mom, dad, or maybe grandpa would espouse their philosophy about people, starting with something like this, “Ya know, there are two kinds of people in this world…” and then they’d give you their broad take on the human race? I’m here to add another grouping of two to the human race: maximizers and satisficers.

In the book “Welcome to Your Brain,” the
authors describe maximizers as people who “spend a lot of time worrying about differences, no matter how small. In a consumer society with choices everywhere, maximizers suffer from an inability to recognize when an alternative is good enough. Indeed, from an economic perspective, spending the additional time on maximization doesn’t make sense since your time itself has some monetary value.”
On the opposite end of the spectrum we have satisficers who are described as individuals who “look until they find something good enough, then stop. Satisficers are decisive, don’t look back, and have little regret, even about mistakes.”
So what does this have to persuasion? Plenty, because in an information overloaded society in which some experts estimate the average person sees more than 3,000 marketing messages a day we cannot possibly process all the information that comes to us through our five senses. And put on top of that the fact that so
much can change in a single day, sometimes it’s all we can do to not just cover our ears, close our eyes and start screaming.
For example; I can’t process all the features of all the smart phones and balance them with all the pricing options while weighing all the new features and options I hear might come out in the next few months. TMI – too much information! Therefore, if I’m like most people I will “satisfice.” Satisficing refers to “the act of choosing an alternative that is just sufficient to satisfy a goal.” I do it, I bet you do it and so do most other people.
Dr. Cialdini’s six principles of influence act as mental short cuts, decision triggers if you will, in an information overloaded society because they help us quickly process information in a way that allows us to make a quicker decisions that we’re satisfied with. Here are some quick examples related to buying a smart phone.
Liking – A good friend of yours owns the phone you’re considering and has nothing but good things to say. He encourages you to buy the same phone and you trust his opinion because you have the same tastes in a lot of things.
Reciprocity – When you were comparing phones and asking questions the store clerk spent a lot of time with you. You’d feel kind of bad not buying from him after he did all that for you.
Authority – You read Consumer Reports and it rated one phone you’re considering highest in three of four categories. The magazine is the most reputable, unbiased source you know.
Consensus – Everyone has the brand you’re looking at and people are raving about it. They can’t all be wrong.
Consistency – When you told the salesperson the general features you were looking for she pointed you to a phone that had almost every single one. How can you not buy it after you
said that’s what you wanted in a phone?
Scarcity – You’re shown a phone and told a newer model is coming out in a few months. Now you worry because you might not be able to get this one at the low price because everyone else will buy them up while it’s still a great deal.
As noted earlier, most people engage in satisficing but that still leaves the maximizers so how do we deal with them? Maximizers by nature are probably more analytical so my advice would be to concentrate on these principles of influence:
Authority – Let them know what the experts are saying and show them hard data because this appeals to their strength – logic.
Consistency – Get them to tell you in detail what they want. The more detail the better because if you can show them how your offering matches up then it’s only logical for the deep thinker to go with your request.
Scarcity – No one likes to lose so show them their lost dollars, time, and opportunity by not going with your recommendation relatively soon. Remind them that new features and upgrades will always come out but they’re losing the opportunity to enjoy your product in the meantime.
So whether your mom, dad, or grandpa were right about their two tier classification systems, science tells us there’s at least one other category, maximizers and satisficers. It would do you well to not only understand which category you fall into but which category those you’re trying to persuade fall into because it will make the persuasion process much easier.
Brian, CMCT 
influencepeople 
Helping You Learn to Hear
“Yes”.

The Saddest Kodak Moment

/2 Comments/by

Many of you reading this might remember the Kodak commercials in the 1970s that introduced the world to the “Kodak moment.” This phrase referred to those times – happy, heartwarming, fun – you wanted to preserve forever on film. That ad campaign helped Eastman Kodak, founded in 1889, reign supreme in the photographic film industry with a 90% share by 1976! That dominance began to slide in late ‘90s with the advent of digital photos and culminated in the company declaring bankruptcy in January 2012.

When I read an article recently, Barriers to Change: The Real Reason Behind the Kodak Downfall, it brought me back to a conversation I had with Dennis Gilbert, owner of Appreciative Strategies, LLC. During our talk Dennis told me he found the fall of Kodak fascinating and wanted my take on it from an influence and persuasion perspective.
According to John Kotter, author of the article noted above, “The Kodak problem, on the surface, is that it did not move into the digital world well enough and fast enough. Recent articles dig a bit more and find that there were people who saw the problem coming — people buried in the organization — but the firm did not act when it should have, which is decades ago.”
What really caught my eye was, “there were people who saw the problem coming — people buried in the organization — but the firm did not act when it should have.” Some people in Kodak knew what to do but couldn’t persuade the ultimate decision makers to make the necessary changes.

 

In hindsight, do you think Kodak would have made the necessary changes two or three decades ago if they had a mulligan? Of course they would have. I won’t claim to have any clue on what Kodak should have done, when they should have done it, or how they should have implemented those changes. What I do know is the lack of persuasion skills by those who had a pulse on the market has cost this once great company dearly. And let’s not forget, Kodak’s fall isn’t just about shareholder value, it’s about the people who’ve poured their heart and soul into the company who might be facing major life changes as the company restructures. Jobs may be lost, benefits will probably be restricted and pensions could be impacted to name just a few things that could create hardship for tens of thousands of current and former employees.

Is persuasion an important skill? You bet it is! There’s no substitute for expertise in your chosen field but expertise isn’t enough. Knowing the most about stocks does you little good of you can’t persuade people when to buy and sell. Likewise, a manager knowing her company and the industry inside and out isn’t enough if she can’t persuade her team to take the necessary actions that will lead to success.

I’m sure the mid-level managers at Kodak knew the business, competition and could clearly see the trends. However, despite their skills they were unable to convince people up the corporate ladder to start making the necessary changes. I don’t know what they did or did not do but knowing they were probably dealing with a lot of pragmatic and analytical personality types I’d have suggested some variation of the following: Tapping into scarcity – here’s what we stand to lose if we don’t act now – might have helped. Maybe tying the needed changes back to Kodak’s mission statement – consistency – might have done the trick. Perhaps sharing more stats – authority – with attention grabbing methods would have arrested senior management’s attention.
Convincing someone to change is never easy but we cannot put the blame on others anymore than a teacher can blame students for not learning. I’m a sales trainer and when someone asks me for sales advice the number one thing I tell them is this: no matter what the outcome, take full responsibility for it. If you made the sale, figure out what you did right then keep doing it and refining it. Likewise, if you didn’t make the sale ask yourself why then set out to learn from your mistakes and figure out ways to overcome them in the future.
The further removed management is from the customer the more difficult it is to make good decisions unless they have excellent communication with the field people. Sun Tzu said as much in his classic, The Art of War, when he warned readers to beware of high-level dumb saying, “Those who are not at the scene of action and do not know what is going on should not give orders.”
Sun Tzu also told the world, “Those who know where and when the battle will be fought can marshal all of their resources to the right place.” Some Kodak employees knew when and where the battle was to be fought but senior managers acted too late. Now it remains to be seen how many Kodak moments are left.
Here’s my advice for you – continue to become an expert in your field because that gives you the credibility you need to have a platform that people will listen too. But don’t stop there! Make sure you learn the science of influence so your great ideas turn into projects or your great presentations turn into sales. That will ensure your professional success.If you’re viewing this by email and want to leave a comment click here.

 

Brian, CMCT
influencepeople 
Helping You Learn to Hear “Yes”.

Give Them Reasons to Listen to You

/1 Comment/by

If you’re on Facebook then you might have seen the following post recently. If you’re not a Facebook user you might have heard the story in one form or another:

A man sat at a metro station in Washington D.C., and started to play the violin; it was a cold January morning. He played six Bach pieces for about 45 minutes. During that time, since it was rush hour, it was calculated that 1,100 people went through the station, most of them on their way to work. Only six people stopped and stayed for a while. About 20 gave him money, but continued to walk their normal pace. He collected $32. When he finished playing and silence took over, no one noticed it. No one applauded, nor was there any recognition. The violinist was Joshua Bell, one of the most talented musicians in the world. He had just played one of the most intricate pieces ever written, on a violin worth $3.5 million dollars.
Two days before his playing in the subway, Joshua Bell sold out at a theater in Boston where the seats averaged $100. This was organized by the Washington Post as part of a social experiment about perception, taste, and priorities of people. The outlines were: in a commonplace environment at an inappropriate hour, do we perceive beauty? Do we stop to appreciate it? Do we recognize the talent in an unexpected context?
I viewed this not from the angle of failing to appreciate beauty but through the lens of influence. I contend a big reason people didn’t stop is because they had no frame of reference for what was taking place. After all, how many of us could tell the difference between a very good violinist and a great one? Probably very few of us. And how many of us could tell the difference between notes played on a $1,000 violin and one worth millions? Even fewer I might guess.
Had there been something to let people know in advance that one of the world’s most famous musicians was playing a multi-million dollar instrument it’s a sure bet people would have stopped if for no other reason than curiosity. This goes to the principle of authority and its proper use in the persuasion process.
This principle of influence tells us people look to experts when they’re unsure of the right course of action to take. The more uncertain they are the more they depend on the other person’s expertise. The problem however is this; sometimes people have no clue who the person is they’ve encountered and have no idea about their expertise.
This is why it’s critical in the persuasion process to let people know  your credentials up front; it gives them a reason to listen. After all, if someone is giving free advice on money matters you may or may not listen to them.  But if you find out it’s Warren Buffet, one of the richest people in the world, you’ll probably stop what you’re doing and give him your full attention because his advice might make you a lot better off financially.
Each of us engages the persuasion process daily because we ask people to do things and hope to hear them say, “Yes.” My question for you is this; do you let those you deal with know about your expertise? If not, you should; you could become a much more effective persuader.
It’s actually pretty simple to do this most of the time so I’ll share two things I regularly do. First; when I speak to an audience about influence I make sure the event host reads my bio. I want to make sure the audience knows before I speak that I’m one of only 27 people in the world certified to train on behalf of Robert Cialdini, PhD., when it comes to psychology of persuasion. I also want them to know my blog has been viewed by people in more than 175 countries around the world. Both of those facts give me instant credibility when people might be uncertain initially as to why they should give my words more weight than some other sales trainer.
A second simple way to convey authority is through the letter of introduction. Whenever I accompany a State Auto associate on a sales coaching call to an insurance agency I make sure my boss sends an email to the agency owner before I ever step foot inside their business. This is easily accomplished because the email is just a variation of the bio I use when doing public speaking. This removes the “who’s the home office guy” thought that might cross the mind of the agency owner and helps to establish my credibility before I arrive.
So here’s my persuasion advice: next time you go to an important meeting or speaking engagement, take advantage of the principle of authority by making sure those you interact with know who you are and what your credentials are beforehand. Establishing your expertise upfront will make them pay more attention and give you an opportunity to shine when you build your case and make your presentation.
If you’re viewing this by email and want to listen to the audio version click here. If you want to leave a comment click here.
Brian, CMCT
influencepeople 
Helping You Learn to Hear “Yes”.

Influencers from Around the World – Could Shakespeare give Women Career Advice?

/2 Comments/by

This month’s guest blogger in the Influencers from Around the World series is Cathrine Moestue. Cathrine hails from Norway and is one of only 27 Cialdini Method Certified Trainers (CMCT) in the world! In addition to her intelligence and business savvy Cathrine is a lot of fun to engage with. If you’d like to connect with her she’s on Facebook, LinkedIn and Twitter. I know you’ll enjoy “Could Shakespeare give Women Career Advice?”

Brian, CMCT
influencepeople 
Helping You Learn to Hear “Yes”.
Could Shakespeare give Women Career Advice?

“All the world’s a stage, and all the men and women merely players: They have their exits and their entrances; and one woman in her time plays many parts.” William Shakespeare, As You Like It.

This quotation has several meanings. First, and most simply, it means we all have roles to play. We like to think we are independent, and that we choose how we act, but in reality we have many unconscious habits that can jeopardize our true authority in the workplace. It is not just about doing a good job it is also about both looking and sounding the part.

As a corporate trainer and business coach, my success depends upon my clients reaching their goals after having worked together. In this blog post I want to share some insights and tips from the science of influence along with my experience coaching women in their careers.

Recently I have encountered a problem with competent business women  dressing in a way that makes me perceive them more like “girls,” rather than looking the part their professional roles would dictate.

They all shared with me that they were passed over for career opportunities they wanted and were qualified for. Not all of them to the same degree or even in the same way, but this was a shared experience. Could this be because of the way they looked? I think so.

I have always been fascinated with the phrase “perception is reality” because it challenges us to take a mental step back and do a reality check on our automatic reactions in any given situation. It is true – there is no reality, only people’s perception.

If you want to be more empowered and increase your influence skills, it is wise to do a “reality check” on your beliefs and spend time learning what behaviors increase your effectiveness. The best place to look is the science of influence.

Robert Cialdini, PhD, writes in Influence: Science and Practice, that our authority is communicated through cues, which include all your nonverbal cues, the way you look and the sound of your voice are more important than you might think. These are the small things that make the big differences.

One study found people were 350% more likely to follow a 31-year old jaywalker into traffic when he was wearing a suit compared to when he wore trousers and a work shirt. Our clothing provides an efficient, effective shortcut, useful for both simple and complicated decisions. Clothing is one thing, but your tone of voice is just as important, and together they can be more important than what you actually say.

What “cues” do you wear that might increase or decrease the perception of you as an authority in your work environment? If you don’t want to miss the next chance for a promotion or you just want to be taken more seriously, make sure you don’t make any of the following mistakes.

Career bungling #1 Believing the best and the smartest are always rewarded accordingly.

Wrong. Those who are competent and look and sound professional are those who smoothly maneuver themselves up the corporate ladder. Competence is not enough although you most certainly need it. It will only serve you to get your foot in the door but will not move you forward. If you accept this and take responsibility to play your role professionally you have already increased your chances of reaching your goals sooner. Luckily, how you look is one of the easiest things you can address on your way to become a more effective agent of influence.

Career bungling #2 Dressing inappropriately.

Informal fashion has made it more difficult to find the right job outfit but you can follow this rule: dress for the job you want and not for the one you have. Short skirts, seductive styles, and high heels that are too high will not get you were you want to go – at least not in the business world. Like it or not, people notice both the quality and the style of your dress and make mental notes about you. There are exceptions to this rule and you can find successful women who break them, but their attire is overlooked because they’re probably geniuses in their fields. Remember, they are the exception, not the rule.

Career bungling #3 Grooming in public.

When was the last time you saw a man check his hair after lunch? Or file his nails in management meeting? Just the thought of it is ridiculous. Even if you are discreet, this behavior will get noticed and it will not enhance your credibility. Long hair is back in fashion but be prepared to lose the “Alice in Wonderland” look if you want to be taken more seriously.

Don’t make the mistake of judging the apparent simplicity of these errors, because small things really do make big differences when it comes to others’ perception of us.

Imaginary but new coaching advice from Shakespeare

Make yourself aware of your business role, accept it and learn the difference between the private you and the corporate you.

  • Dress like your clients or colleagues +1.
  • Do your grooming in the bathroom, not in the board room.
  • Look at successful women and notice what they’re wearing. Also pay attention to women in positions you aspire to because that’s how you should dress.

 

The most effective authority is the credible authority – a woman with both expertise and trustworthiness. Meryl Streep wins Oscars because she both looks and sounds the part. I know you aren’t an actor but it’s not about the acting profession. What I’m talking about is understanding the psychological principle behind being perceived as an authority – being competent and looking the part. Don’t forget, hearing “yes” to a job promotion for many of us is like winning an Oscar in our everyday lives.If you’re viewing this by email and want to leave a comment click here.

Cathrine Moestue
Empowering Women to hear YES
 

How We Deal with Information Overload

/2 Comments/by

We’re in the dead of winter in Columbus, Ohio, and that means each morning as I make my way into work, it’s pitch black outside. As I drove to work recently, traffic was heavy and moving slowly so I had time to reflect. As I looked around I was struck by how much there is to see but which goes unnoticed when I’m driving closer to the speed limit.

During the drive I paid particular attention to the buildings and myriad of lights. The lights were easily distinguished from the car lights as were buildings from the trees and many other objects. Having worked for State Auto Insurance for more than 20 years, I’ve conservatively made the same drive about 4,000 times and yet, on this day, I noticed certain things for the first time.
In the midst of all this my mind wandered to persuasion and how the principles of influence work on people. Just like my brain doesn’t need to process certain input – many objects in the distance – when making the drive, neither do our minds process all the information that comes our way each day. Here’s an interesting quote that tells us just how bombarded we are:

“This year, the average consumer will see or hear 1 million marketing messages – that’s almost 3,000 per day. No human being can pay attention to 3,000 messages every day.” Fast Company – Permission Marketing by William C. Taylor

You might be thinking “Wow!” right about now, so I’ll wow you even more. That quote is now 14 years old! Imagine how much more marketing material comes your way though the proliferation of the Internet, Facebook, and smart phones. There’s no way you can process it all and that’s why Martin Lindstrom, author of Buyology, asserts that 85% of what you do every day is processed by your subconscious.
Because we cannot process all the information that comes in through our senses, our brains develop shortcuts to help us manage. The principles of influence tap into this subconscious processing quite often. While there are certainly times when they lead to mistakes and other times where manipulative people use them to take advantage of us, more often than not they lead to good decisions and that’s why we come to rely on them so heavily. Below are
some examples of the principles at work in your decision making.
1. When your neighbor gets his house painted and you think it looks nice you’re probably very willing to use the same painters. Your friendship – liking – lets you rely on their recommendation much more than those of mere acquaintances. After all, friends want to help friends.
2. Someone invites you to a party and you enjoy yourself. Even though you’ve never asked them to a movie or dinner before, you do so next time because you appreciate their hospitality. We tend to “return the favor” because that’s how reciprocity works.
3. You’re not too interested in seeing a new movie but four people in your group of six want to see it, so you go along. Consensus, what everyone else is doing, impacted your decision. You may or may not like the movie but odds are you still enjoyed yourself because you were with your friends and that was better than going to a movie alone.
4. You’re watching your regular news station – could be FOX or CNN – and hear political commentary from a news anchor quoting a prominent politician from the party you support. You’re more likely to believe the report without investigating it further because of the authority of both the news anchor and the politician.
5. Your friend asked you to help him move next Saturday because you once said, “If you ever need anything just call me.” You really wanted to watch the ballgame but you help him instead because if you didn’t you’d feel like you were backing out of your word. That’s consistency at work in you.
6. You love IKEA and hear they’re having a huge sale but it ends on Sunday. You hop in the car and make the drive to the store even though you don’t really need any new furniture. Scarcity is prompting you to do something you wouldn’t have done otherwise.
In most of these examples, critical thinking is largely bypassed. When I give a talk or lead a training session I always have people who insist they don’t fall for any of this. I just smile because I know those are typically the people who respond to persuasion attempts the most and their strong reaction is a way to convince themselves they don’t, because it makes them feel as if they’ve lost some freedom of choice and have been duped. But they also miss the point that most of the time people are not trying to take advantage of them. There’s nothing wrong with going to the movie most people want to see or inviting a couple out to dinner because they first invited you to a party. As I noted earlier, the principles of influence generally guide us into good behavior and that’s why we continue to use them “on automatic pilot” so often.If you’re viewing this by email and want to listen to the audio version click here. If you want to leave a comment click here.

Brian, CMCT
influencepeople 
Helping You
Learn to Hear “Yes”.

“There is nothing either good or bad, but thinking makes it so.”

/4 Comments/by

It was in Hamlet that William Shakespeare penned the famous line, “There is nothing either good or bad, but thinking makes it so.” I came across this quote while doing some research for a training class I’ll be leading on attitude but the more I thought about that simple sentence the more I thought about how persuasion differs from manipulation. Some people are uncomfortable with the psychology of persuasion because they think using that knowledge gives them an unfair advantage over others.

It’s true that understanding how people’s minds work and knowing more effective ways to get someone to say “Yes” gives you an advantage. However, I don’t see that being any different than good looking people having a leg up when it comes to modeling, math whizzes doing better in fields like accounting, or people with great voices having a better chance at a singing career.
In each case those people possess something most others do not but we don’t consider it an unfair advantage. To be sure, if a good looking person uses their looks to take advantage of you or if the math genius knowingly confuses you with numbers to get the best deal then we’d say those people were not acting in a fair manner.
Richard
Shell and Mario Moussa, authors of The Art of WOO, have a wonderful quote that goes to the heart of the matter so to speak. They wrote, “An earnest and sincere lover buys flowers and candy for the object of his affections. So does the cad who succeeds to take advantage of another’s heart. But when the cad succeeds, we don’t blame the flowers and candy. We rightly question his character.”
Flowers and candy are neither good nor bad because, as Shakespeare rightly pointed out, we are the ones who ascribe meaning to them. Flowers can be wonderful when a man gives them to a woman when he asks her to marry him. They can also signify profound sadness when displayed at a funeral. Candy might not be so good if
you’re on a diet but it’s usually received with great joy by little kids on Halloween.
So
what does this have to do with understanding the psychology of persuasion? The six principles of influence as defined by Dr. Cialdini are neither good nor bad. They simply describe how people respond to one another and each can be used in positive ways or each can be used to take advantage of another person. Let’s take a brief look at each principle to see how this can happen.
Reciprocity tells us people feel obligated to return the favor when someone first does something for them. This is a great principle to know if you helped a friend move and need help down the road because your friend will be very likely to want to return the favor and help you. Of course there are always people who give you things or do things for you just so you’ll feel obligated to help them in some way.
Liking is the natural inclination to enjoy working with or being around people we like. Finding ways to like other people and get them to like you makes life much easier. Don’t you enjoy working with people you like? Sure you do. And I bet you want to like your neighbors and hope they like you. Deceitful people will tap into this principle by flattering you just to get you to do what they want.
Consensus is the tendency for us to go along with the crowd. Much of the time this is the right thing to do because “there’s safety in numbers” and “everybody can’t be wrong.” A dishonest person might try to sway you by telling you how “everyone” is doing something because they understand you’ll feel a psychological pull to go along with the crowd.
Authority is all about our reliance on people we view as experts. When you don’t have time to do a lot of research it’s a big time saver to defer to an expert. For example, most people don’t want to do their own taxes so they hire an accountant. On the flip side, there are people who prey upon this by creating a false impression of authority just so you’ll trust them.
Consistency is all about people doing what they say they’ll do or doing what you’ve done in the past. That’s very good because we can rely on people to continue in a consistent manner when we engage them. Of course, the manipulator seeing that can dupe the unsuspecting person by referring to something they said just to take advantage of this principle.
Scarcity comes into play when people’s actions are impacted by the thought of something becoming less available. Quite often this is good because we don’t miss out on opportunities that might go away. However,
this can be used against us when untrustworthy types create a false sense of urgency to get us to act in the moment rather than giving us time to consider all options.
As you can see, each of the six principles has an upside. In fact, I’d say the upsides are huge because they typically help us make good decisions faster. After all, if they didn’t lead to good decisions most of the time we’d quickly figure that out and stop responding to the cues. But just as flowers and candy aren’t
always good, the principles can be used in manipulative ways by some people who are only looking to get their way no matter the cost to the other, unsuspecting person. Just like the honest and sincere lover and the cad, it comes down to the motive of the person wielding the principles. I trust that you as a reader have come to see my focus is on the ethical use so win-win situations are created. Even if you don’t see yourself as the influencing type, understanding the principles will also help you protect yourself from the cad.

Brian, CMCT
influencepeople 
Helping You Learn to Hear “Yes”.