Tag Archive for: psychology of persuasion

DISCover Keys to Persuading Different Personality Types

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Should you try to persuade different personality types with different principles of influence? Several years ago I conducted a survey on that topic and the results seemed to indicate there were certain principles of influence that were more effective with particular personality types.

My original survey contained a mixture of business and personal questions, which led many people to contact me because they felt they responded differently in business situations vs. personal settings. For example, in business they felt friendship was far less important when it came to saying “Yes” to someone than it might be away from the office.

Because much of what I write about is oriented towards business I decided to conduct a new survey that would be entirely focused on business-related issues. I’m happy to report that more than 500 people participated in the survey!The actual survey questions can be seen here. Without going into great detail, what’s important for you to understand is each question had three possible answers:

For the most part those who contacted me years ago were correct – people seem to respond to different principles of influence in the business environment than they do away from work. For example, with each personality type those taking the survey responded most often to the principle of authority. That’s not to say another principle such as liking was irrelevant but it was clear from the data that given the choice to respond because of friendship versus a perceived expert or hard data, people choose the expert or authoritative information when it came to saying “Yes.”

Something else to understand about the survey are the four personality types I asked survey participants to choose from. The personality choices are similar to the DISC profile you may be familiar with:

Pragmatic/Driver– This is someone who is more focused on accomplishing tasks than building relationships. They’re also more focused on control of others and situations than they are self-control. Donald Trump would be an off the charts representative of the driver personality style.

Expressive/Influencer– This person is more focused on building relationships versus accomplishing tasks. They’re also more focused on control of others and situations than they are on self-control. Oprah Winfrey would be a classic example of the influencer personality style.

Amiable/Facilitator– This is someone who is more focused on building relationships than accomplishing tasks. They’re also more focused on self-control as opposed to control of others or situations. Based on the roles she plays, Sandra Bullock comes to mind for this amiable personality style.

Thinker/Analytical– This individual is more focused on accomplishing tasks that building relationships. They tend to display more concern about self-controlvs. control of others or situations. Albert Einstein would be the perfect picture of this analytical personality style.

In the coming weeks I’ll share details on each of the four personality types and give some tips on the best ways to persuade people when you have a handle on their personality.

Brian Ahearn, CMCT®
Chief Influence Officer
influencePEOPLE 
Helping You Learn to Hear “Yes”.

Influencers from Around the World – The Crazy Effect

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This month’s Influencers from Around the World post
comes from Yago De Marta. Yago has been a
guest blogger at Influence PEOPLE since I started this series. Originally from
Spain, Yago now spends most of his time in Latin America working with clients
to help them speak more fluently and persuasively. To learn more about Yago
visit YagoDeMarta.com or connect with
him on Facebook, LinkedIn or Twitter.

Brian Ahearn, CMCT® 
Chief Influence Officer
influencePEOPLE 
Helping You Learn to Hear “Yes”.

The Crazy Effect
Some
weeks ago I met 50 of the most talented young boys and girls in Latin America.
They have accomplished their objective – to get the best qualifications of
their country. And now, they are called to be the next leaders of their
continent. There I was, I had to give a speech about what I would do if I were
them, how I would strive to capture an audience’s attention.
I told
them, “Speak easy.”
I told
them what happened to me five years ago, when I realized of the meaning of “the
crazy effect.”
I was in
Bolivia because I was working for the presidential campaign when I heard the
singer Julio Iglesias was in that country and his next concert would be in the
same city where I was staying. I felt very excited because Julio is the
greatest Spanish singer, and with more than 350 million CDs sold, he is one of
the best-selling artists in the world.
When I
arrived at the concert the stadium was full of people! I could feel how eager the
crowd was as they waited for Julio Iglesias to sing his songs. He started the
concert singing the sound track of our lives. These were songs people had song
in their minds thousand of times before. The audience became excited, then
happy. They were listening to songs that they loved and they felt as if they were
one.
But, here
comes “the crazy effect!” Julio started singing songs he first sang in the 1990s.
Those songs are in English so most people couldn´t understand the lyrics. Worst
of all, those songs were not hits in Latin America.
As he
sang “Caruso,” and “To all the girls I’ve love before,” people stopped singing,
and some started to whistle (the equivalent of booing in America). Then he sang
“Crazy.”
One of
the greatest artists in the world was “losing” the audience and I realized how
many times I’ve seen the same effect with businessmen. People forget that a speech
(or a concert) is not yours; the audience owns the speech.
You can’t
say whatever you want. What you say must be:
  • Important,
  • Interesting,
    and most of all,
  • Relevant

 If you
speak about things that only your care about and don’t make it relevant for the
audience somehow, some way, you’re dead!
So when I
finished to give my speech on “The Crazy Effect” to these young, super talented
girls and boys, two guys stood up and told me they wouldn’t dumb down their speaking
just to be understood by more people. They were not meant to give people “what
they needed” because that’s what they call “populism.” In other words, their
speeches would not be about the audience, they would be about them (the
speakers)!
Well, oftentimes
people don’t know really what they want, they only think they do. However,
reality is people need to live a moment that’s worth something to them. So they
need things that are interesting, important, beautiful or thrilling…to them. In
other words, they need to feel that the speech is “about them.”
You can
talk about whatever you want but you have to be understandable, credible and
memorable. Whatever you are talking about you have to make sure it touches the
people because it has to be about them.
Yago

Social Proof in Social Media

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Not long ago, as I scanned through my social
media sites one morning, I came across a blog post where someone shared six
reasons why they decided to give up alcohol. Curiosity got the best of me so I
clicked on the link to find out why the author made that choice.
All of his reasons were valid and probably the
best choice for him. What caught my attention more than his reasons were the comments
that ensued. At the time I read the post, all 15 comments were from people who
had also given up alcohol. There wasn’t one person who took the opposing view.
I decided to post a comment about why I choose
to drink alcohol. To every point he shared I could make the opposite case as
long as the drinking was in moderation. Despite the fact that according to a 2012
Gallup Poll 64% of Americans
drink alcohol on occasion, I felt odd posting my comment because I was
definitely in the minority.
It shouldn’t have surprised me that despite
the fact that two out of three Americans drink, all the readers said they
didn’t drink. As I thought about it two reasons came to mind.
The first reason was social proof (aka
consensus or peer pressure). This principle of influence tells us the more
people do something the more inclined others are to join in. In other words, we
get our cues for socially acceptable behavior by looking at how others are
behaving in the same situation.
This was a classic case of social proof in
action because the more people posted about their experience, the more others
felt free to do the same thing.  It’s not
just that other people posted that made the difference, it was that all the
posts were similar. You see, when we notice the behavior of people we view as
similar to us that magnifies the feeling that we should behave in the same way.
For example, if a teen sees a large group of
people doing something do you think they’re more inclined to follow suit if
that large group consists of other teenagers or adults? Teenagers, of course.
Another reason the comments gained traction
was due to liking. We tend to like those we see as similar to ourselves in some
way so readers seeing the author had a similar stance on alcohol made them like
him more and, therefore, made it easier for them to post.
Social media is amazing for so many reasons. At
my age I can easily recall the days before mobile phones, the Internet and
social media. Soon younger people won’t have any recollection of those days and
therefore might not marvel at the technology the way some of us do.
However, despite all the good social media can
do, sometimes it doesn’t change human behavior much. Prior to social media, and
still today, I bet you hang around people who are similar to you. Take politics
for example. My guess is the vast majority of your friends hold essentially the
same political views as you do. Being similar generally makes for less
contentious conversations and better times for the majority of people.
That same trigger applies to those with whom
we connect on social media, the blogs we read, the news stations we watch, and
so on. There’s nothing wrong with this but the more time goes by the more
entrenched we become in our viewpoints. Knowing our point of view isn’t always
correct, isn’t it worth it to stretch ourselves some?
Here’s my advice – make it a point to get
together on occasion with people who are different than you. If you watch Fox
News take a look at CNN sometimes, and if you’re a CNN person, watch Fox News.
Believe me, it won’t kill you. Follow some blogs or people you know who hold
different opinions than you do, if for no other reason than to try to
understand their perspective. You might be surprised at what you learn.
Brian Ahearn, CMCT®
Chief Influence Officer
influencePEOPLE 
Helping You Learn to Hear “Yes”.

5 Tips for Persuasive Presentations

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In June, I had the pleasure of giving a
keynote presentation to about 200 members of HRACO (Human Resources of Central
Ohio). It went really well and the best thing I can say is I persuaded many
people to try some of the influence tips I shared.
Often people ask me what I do to prepare for a
presentation. I’ll start by telling you what I don’t do – wing it. I always put
in lot of time, effort and practice. Here are five tips you might find helpful
next time you want to give a persuasive presentation.
1. Preparation – Vince Lombardi,
Hall of Fame coach of the Green Bay Packers, said, “Most people have the will
to win but few have the will to prepare to win.” This can’t be overstated
enough. Nobody would expect an athlete to perform with excellence without
countless hours of practice so why should you expect to give a great
presentation without plenty of practice?
When I do the Principles of Persuasion workshop
I stress this point – what you do before
the thing you do quite often makes your attempt at influence much easier. I’ll
spend at least an hour a day for weeks on end practicing my presentations. As I
do so I’m timing myself to make sure I stay within the allotted time. I work on
hand gestures, head movements at key times and voice inflection.
When I’m alone in the car I turn the radio off
and use the down time to practice. When I’m working out alone, between
exercises I practice parts of the talk. I’ll even record myself so I can hear
how it sounds.
2. Visual
Aids
– I use Power Point as a visual aid to almost all of my presentations and I’ll
have a handout for those who like to take notes. I highly recommend two books that
really influenced how I use this tool – Presentation Zen and The Presentation Secrets ofSteve Jobs.
I’ve moved away from traditional text-filled
slides, bullet points and lists. If I use words it’s usually one or two in very
large font to drive home a key point. Other that that I go almost entirely with
pictures because that’s how people think and best remember things.
I must tell you this; the first time you
present without the text and bullet points it’s a little scary because you
can’t glance at the screen for a reminder of what to say next. However, there
are several great reasons to go this route:
  • It forces you to know your material inside and
    out which makes you look more like a professional.
  • If you do miss something no one is any wiser
    because they’re not thinking, “He didn’t cover that last bullet point.”
  • It keeps the audience focused on you rather
    than the screen.
3. Questions – I ask lots of
questions. There are two reasons you want to do this. First, you can physically
engage the audience by asking for a show of hands if they agree or disagree.
The more you can physically involve people the more attention they’ll pay.
The second reason is people feel compelled to
answer questions. When you ask questions, even without asking people to do
something like raise their hands, they’ll get involved. You’ll see it with the
head nodding. Even those who don’t nod, I’ll bet they’re answering the question
in their heads so they’ve moved from passive listeners to active.
4. Introduction – A strong
introduction is key because it sets the tone for why people should listen to
you. This means you need a bio of less than 200 words so the event host can
introduce you. This leverages the principle of authority because people pay
attention to those they view as having superior knowledge or wisdom.
When I speak there are two critical
differentiators I want people to know. First, I make sure people know I’m one
of just 27 people in the world certified to train on behalf of Robert Cialdini,
the world’s most cited living social psychologist. In addition to authority this
also leverages the principle of scarcity which says people value things more
when they think they’re rare.
I also want audience members to know people in
185 countries have taken time to read my blog. That’s a great “Wow!” factor
that incorporates the principle of consensus. I want those in attendance to think, “If so many
people around the world are reading his stuff he must be pretty good.”
5. Take Away
Ideas
– I want to make sure my audience has tangible ideas for each of the principles
I talk about. It’s nice if they find the material interesting but the bottom
line is showing them how it can help them enjoy more professional success and
personal happiness. To do this I clearly state, “And here’s the application for
you,” then I share with few ways they can use the principle I just discussed in
every day situations.
Whole books are written on the subject of
presentation excellence so there’s no way to do it justice in a short blog
post. However, I hope you find these tips helpful. I know focusing on them has
helped me make great strides in giving more persuasive presentations and I’m
confident they can help you do the same.

Brian Ahearn, CMCT® 
Chief Influence Officer
influencePEOPLE 
Helping You Learn to Hear “Yes”.

If the Pot was Boiling Would You Even Notice?

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There’s an old tale that says if a frog is placed in a pot of boiling water it would immediately jump out but if it’s placed in a pot with room temperature water that’s slowly turned up it won’t perceive the difference and can be boiled alive.
I don’t know if the story is true because I’ve never wanted to harm a frog just to find out. True or not, it illustrates a common reality that sometimes change happens so gradually we find ourselves in an unintended place before we realize what’s happened.
This is top of mind because over the past month I’ve had the opportunity to spend a day with four different interns at State Auto. I thoroughly enjoy those days every summer because their wide-eyed excitement is invigorating. During our time together I give them insight into our sales coaching, sales training and how to ethically persuade people.
As important as those topics are, I think the most valuable thing I talk about with them is their future. When I do this I always share something I’ve regularly said was one of the most impacting things I’ve ever done – writing a personal mission statement.
Although I wrote about this four years ago I felt compelled to reexamine the topic again. You can view my mission statement here.
When it comes to our careers it’s so easy for us to be like the frog in the room temperature water. Everything starts off okay and slowly but surely things change. Our 40-hour week becomes 45 then 50, but we hardly notice. We begin to work most Saturday mornings and that starts to stretch into Sunday. After all, we’re highly productive so we’re given more responsibility. We know if we keep performing we’ll get that next promotion and we already have lots of plans for the extra money we’ll make. We justify the need for nicer things because we’re working so hard and therefore deserve a bigger house, nicer car, new furniture, etc.
We tell ourselves those good things are for our spouse, kids or other family members. But in the process we start to miss the Little League games, school activities and other important events. In the grand scheme of life they’re not that big a deal – well, maybe not that big to you but that’s probably not the case for your kids or spouse. Sure, they “understand,” but secretly they wish you’d choose them over work.
Then comes the day that Harry Chapin famously sang about in “Cat’s in the Cradle.” Your loved ones decline the offer to spend time with you because they have other activities that are now more important to them. You’re hurt and disappointed. You feel like they don’t appreciate all you’ve done for them. The problem is, you never really knew what they wanted. The water is boiling and you can’t do anything about it.
How does a personal mission statement help? It makes you sit down today and consider the end. What kind of person do you want to become? How do you want to be remembered? When it’s all said and done what do you want out of life?
I told a friend recently how I’d gone to a Christmas party last year at a beautiful home. When I saw the ornate decorations in this huge home my gut reaction was, “What am I doing wrong that I can’t give this to my family?” The good news is, the thought didn’t even last a minute. I quickly came to my senses and realized, where I am in life is exactly where I’ve chosen to be.
You see, my mission statement clearly says my priorities are faith, family, personal wellbeing, then my career. Now, for those who know me, between my day job as a sales coach/trainer for State Auto and my activities with Influence PEOPLE, I work a lot. However, I construct my day so those things don’t take away from my family. As I write this on a Tuesday evening, Jane and Abigail are at work so I’m not taking any time away from them.
I start my weekdays at 4 a.m. because I don’t what to give up other things I love like reading, working out and running. I could use those extra morning hours to climb the corporate ladder but that would mean giving up time I can devote to other things I’ve said are more important.
I encourage you to take a look at the blog post I wrote about “The Value of a Personal Mission Statement.” It might be a trigger for you to do something similar. The strongest thing I can say to encourage you is that writing a personal mission statement was one of the most impacting activities I’ve ever undertaken.
P.S. I thought you’d find this interesting. As I was writing this post Abigail came home and wanted to go for a walk. Rather than choose to finish this post I took a break and went with her. I know most teenagers don’t ask their parents to do things with them and before I know it she’ll be out of the house and I’ll long for these days. A choice like this was easy because I set my priorities more than 20 years ago when I wrote my mission statement.
Brian Ahearn, CMCT®
Chief Influence Officer
influencePEOPLE 
Helping You Learn to Hear “Yes”.

 

Giver, Taker or Matcher – Which are You?

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Do you look to help others? If you do, then
the next question is, why?
I just finished an excellent book, Give and Take, by Adam Grant. He
explores the principle of reciprocity but from a slightly different angle than
I typically do. Reciprocity is the psychological principle that tells us people
feel obligated to give back to those who’ve first given to them. Reciprocity is
triggered by the act of giving.
When it comes to reciprocity Grant explores
three kinds of people – takers, matchers and givers. As you might imagine, some
people don’t offer much help or only do so if they think they can get something
in return. These are takers and generally it’s best to avoid them because they
don’t really care about you except in so far as you can help them.
Matchers describe most people. You help them
and they’ll help you because they feel the pull of reciprocity.  They’ll offer help but usually not go
overboard. They’re almost keeping mental accounts because they feel if they
give too much they’ll be taken advantage of or not have enough time to tend to
their priorities.
Givers are those rare people who look to give
simply because they believe it’s the right thing to do. They’ll give far more than they
receive quite often and while they can be taken advantage of, for them that
doesn’t negate the reality that giving is the right thing to do. As a giver you
may give far more than you receive but you never know how doing something for
someone might just come around and be life changing for them as well as you.
As I read the book it reminded me of how I
came to know Robert Cialdini and his team at Influence At Work (IAW). I came in
contact with Dr. Cialdini’s work in 2002 when a friend, Nancy Edwards, was
studying for her MBA at The Ohio State University. Nancy saw a presentation Dr.
Cialdini had given at Stanford and was kind enough to share the video with me.
As I learned about the principles of influence a light bulb came on – the
principles explained all the sales techniques I’d learned and taught!
I purchased a copy of the video, began to
share it with small groups and we’d talk about how we could apply the concepts
at State Auto. One thing I appreciated about Dr. Cialdini was his emphasis on
non-manipulative ways to persuade people.
Sometime later, Stanford came out with a new
marketing piece for the video and it read, “Call it Influence, Persuasion, or
even Manipulation,” then went on to describe the video in more detail. Because
Dr. Cialdini was so emphatic about the ethical use of the principles I decide
to email Stanford. I basically said, “No one wants to be manipulated and I
doubt anyone wants to be known as a manipulator. That word can’t be helping your
sales but it sure could be hurting sales.”
Time passed and I never heard from Stanford
but one day my phone rang and it was Bobette Gorden, the vice president of
IAW, calling to thank me for sending that email to Stanford.
Apparently someone at Stanford read the email and decided to change how they
were marketing Dr. Cialdini’s video.
As fate would have it, during that call,
Bobette let me know Dr. Cialdini spoke about influence around the world in case
we ever needed a keynote speaker. It so happened we were looking for a speaker for
some upcoming agency conferences! In 2004, Dr. Cialdini spoke at State Auto
several times and that summer I went through his two-day Principles of
Persuasion workshop.
From there you might just say the rest is
history. I’ve now been a certified trainer for IAW for more than five years and
have been blogging on the subject of influence for more than four years.
The point of this post is twofold. First, for
those who are looking for ways to be more influential through giving, pick up a
copy of Give and Take. You’ll be a
more effective persuader because of it and more importantly, a better person.
The second point of the post is to encourage
you to be a giver because it’s the right thing to do. Trust that good things
will come your way as a result but in the meantime, look for ways to genuinely
help others. The late Zig Ziglar used to say; “You can get everything in life you want if you will just help enough other people get what they want.” There’s
wisdom and truth in those words so go out today and “give” it a try.

 

Brian, CMCT®
Chief Influence Officer
influencePEOPLE 
Helping You Learn to Hear “Yes”.

Influencers from Around the World – How Executives Can Learn Influence

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This month’s
Influencers from Around the World guest post comes by way of my good friend
Sean Patrick. Through the power of the internet, he sent it to me all the way
from Ireland in just milliseconds. Sean started a his own sales training
company, Sales Training Evaluation, and spends time in various parts of Europe training salespeople and
executives. Sean was in the U.S. several years ago to attend the Principles of
Persuasion workshop and there’s a good chance he’ll be here again in late
summer or early fall. If you don’t get to meet him while he’s here you can always
“meet” him on Facebook, LinkedIn and Twitter.
How
Executives Can Learn Influence
How can executives acquire meaningful persuasion
skills so they can influence outside their power brokerage?  As people like myself know all too well,
skill transfer is one of the toughest tasks that can be placed upon a learning
and development executive.  Natural
persuaders just like successful sales people who adhere to no formal sales
process, struggle to share insights into their behaviors.  They will tell you that they “just do it.”  It just flows.  Words can’t describe the cognitive processes,
emotions and beliefs that form specific actions to take place at specific
intervals during the influence process. So imagine you’re the boss of a very
large department and you need to come up with a plan to motivate more
production out of your staff.  In today’s
corporate world, working environments are highly collaborative as well as
individualistic, where multi stakeholder partnerships exist. It’s these
environments in which the skills of influence rule over old school
manipulation.
According to Dr. Robert Cialdini, today’s
executives who lack the superior communication skills of the “naturals” can
turn to science in place of sourcing the very same skills that win deals, gain
compliance and get employees to willfully change.  Executives can gain consensus and win
concessions by mastering simple basic principles that can be easily learned and
applied in a relatively short period of time.
Here are a few simple ways where influence can be
applied in everyday corporate environments:
1. Liking – Informal conversations during the
workday create an ideal opportunity to discover common areas of interest,
whether it’s a sports team, hobby, or watching “Mad Men.” The important thing
is to establish the commonality early because it creates a sense of goodwill
and trustworthiness in every subsequent encounter. It’s much easier to build
support for projects when the people you’re trying to persuade are already
bonded with you.  Managers, who praise
members of their staff where relationships have been impaired, begin to
radically turn around those relationships through the simple act of
recognition.
Researchers at the University of North Carolina
writing in the Journal of Experimental
Social Psychology, found that men acted more favorably for an individual
who flattered them even if the compliments were untrue. And in their book Interpersonal Attraction
(Addison-Wesley, 1978), Ellen Berscheid and Elaine Hatfield Walster presented
experimental data showing that positive remarks about another person’s traits,
attitude, or performance reliably generates liking in return, as well as
willing compliance.
2. Reciprocity – Line managers who share staff and
resources with their peers who are fast approaching deadlines are more likely
to receive favors and help when they need it in the future. Odds will improve
even more if you say, when your colleague thanks you for the assistance,
something like, “Sure, glad to help. I know how important it is for me to count
on your help when I need it.” 
Gift giving is one of the cruder applications of
the rule of reciprocity. In its more sophisticated uses, it promises a genuine
first-mover advantage on any manager who is trying to foster positive attitudes
and productive personal relationships in the office
3. Social Proof – According to one of Dr. Cialdini’s
research pieces, a group of researchers went door-to-door in Columbia, S.C.,
soliciting donations for a charity campaign and displaying a list of neighborhood
residents who had already donated to the cause. The researchers found that the
longer the donor list was, the more likely those solicited would be to donate
as well.  The people being solicited
became the subject to the power of peer pressure once they saw the names of all
their neighbors on the list.
4. Consistency – People need not only to like you but
also to feel committed to what you want them to do. Good turns are one reliable
way to make people feel obligated to you. Another is to win a public commitment
from them.  Israeli researchers writing
in 1983 in the Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin recounted how they
asked half the residents of a large apartment complex to sign a petition
favoring the establishment of a recreation center for the handicapped. The
cause was good and the request was small, so almost everyone who was asked
agreed to sign. Two weeks later, on National Collection Day for the
Handicapped, all residents of the complex were approached at home and asked to
give to the cause. A little more than half of those who were not asked to sign
the petition made a contribution. But an astounding 92% of those who did sign
donated money. The residents of the apartment complex felt obligated to live up
to their commitments because those commitments were active, public, and
voluntary.
5. Authority – The principle of authority asks us to
believe in the advice dispensed by experts. Since there’s good reason to take
heed to expert advice, executives should take pains to ensure that they
establish their own expertise before they attempt to exert influence.
Surprisingly often, people mistakenly assume that others recognize and
appreciate their experience. The task for managers who want to establish their
claims to expertise is somewhat more difficult. They can’t simply nail their
diplomas to the wall and wait for everyone to notice. A little subtlety is
called for.
Through liking and similarity, they can also
provide an opportunity to establish expertise. Perhaps telling an anecdote
about successfully solving a problem similar to the one that’s on the agenda at
the next meeting or maybe a recreational dinner is the time to describe years
spent mastering a complex discipline, as part of the ordinary give-and-take of
conversation.
6. Scarcity – Study after study shows that items and
opportunities are seen to be more valuable as they become less available.
That’s a tremendously useful piece of information for managers.  Managers can learn from retailers how to
frame their offers not in terms of what people stand to gain but in terms of
what they stand to lose if they don’t act on the information.  According to a 1994 study in the journal Organizational Behavior and Human Decision
Processes, potential losses figure far more heavily in managers’ decision-making
rather than potential gains. In framing their offers, salespeople and
executives should also remember that exclusive information is more persuasive
than widely available data.
The persuasive power of exclusivity can be
harnessed by any manager who comes into possession of information that’s not
widely available and that supports an idea or initiative he or she is aligned
to.  The next time that kind of
information crosses your path, gather your key stakeholders.  The information itself may seem dull, but
exclusivity will give it a special appeal. Push it out to those who need to
buy-in and inform them saying, “You just got this report today. It won’t be
distributed until next week, but I want to give you an early look at what it
shows.” Then notice the rise in interest.
Over to you
If you manage people in your job, how can you take
these examples of persuasion and use to gain compliance?
I’d love to hear about how you’ve pushed yourself
to use these principles of persuasion. 
I’d also love to hear about your wins and what you learned through the
experience.
Sean
Sources:
Influence:
Science and Practice (Allyn & Bacon, 2001)
Influence At Work www.influenceatwork.com         
HBR Business
Essentials: Power, Influence and Persuasion (HBR Press, 2005)
Social Psychology,
3rd ed. (Oxford University Press, 1985)

Why Facebook Doesn’t Change Anyone’s Opinion

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Facebook is useless when it comes go changing people’s opinions. I’m sure many people will disagree with me but I firmly believe that’s the case. My belief comes from personal observation and science.

My personal observation is this – I’ve yet to see people go back and forth on Facebook about any issue where one person finally concedes and says, “Wow, you’ve brought up some interesting points I’ve never considered before. That’s helped change my thinking on this issue.” Have you ever seen someone post anything remotely related to that? I bet not.

Why do I believe science backs up my belief that Facebook isn’t a vehicle to change people’s minds on important issues? Because of Robert Cialdini’s principle of consistency. This principle of influence tells us people feel internal and external pressure to be consistent in what they say and do.  Some factors that strengthen consistency’s pull include someone taking a public, active stand and as long as it’s voluntary and requires some effort people will be more firmly entrenched in their original position.

We all hold beliefs about politics, religion, sex (the big three we’re supposed to avoid discussing in public), as well as many other issues. When we keep those to ourselves we might ponder other people’s views and possibly consider them but once we make our thoughts public we feel the pull of consistency to defend our original position.

Now consider taking an active stand. You begin posting on Facebook. The mere act of taking more and more action gets you to put more and more reasons in front of the world as to why you believe what you believe. You’re convincing yourself with each post that you’re right and the other person is wrong.

Of course, it’s assumed you’re doing this of your own free will – voluntarily. That’s important because we own our views much more than we do the views we might ascribe to primarily because of our parents, peers or the company we work for. So this is one more reason people dig their heels in even further.

And now we come to effort. The more effort you put into something the more you value it and take ownership. Dan Ariely calls this “The IKEA Effect,” because people love their IKEA furniture primarily due to the effort they put into building it. As you start researching to defend your position, check out someone else’s Facebook page or do anything to prepare for the back and forth exchange on Facebook, you are firmly entrenching your beliefs even more because of the effort you’ve expended.

So, having made your views public, actively and voluntarily, while engaging others with time and effort, almost makes it certain you won’t change your opinion. And you know what, the same holds true for the other person. Maybe you should ask yourself if it’s worth it – the time, effort and angst – to debate over Facebook. Personally I think it’s a waste of time because I know no good will come of it.

If you’re open to the reality that maybe, just maybe you don’t have all the facts and aren’t 100% correct all the time then I believe you’d get much more accomplished by sitting face-to-face over coffee or a beer so you can have a discussion. When you do so, each person can share their views and ask questions.

I’ll conclude with this – it used to be considered a good thing to be open minded and willing to change if need be. However, that seems to have gone out the window these days, especially in politics because the external pressure to remain consistent is so strong. If you’re a politician who changes on a position you’ll be crucified as a flip-flopper, waffler or wishy-washy. As everyday citizens get more firmly entrenched in the ideology of their party and take to social media to air their opinions it will only get tougher to persuade people to change. So, if you want to be a master persuader, you’d better rethink your approach if you want to impact someone else for your cause. My simple suggestion is to take it offline.

How Are You Doing? It’s Relative.

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Not too long ago I got a medical bill and was shocked by how large it was. As I thought about paying it I had the feeling many of you might have had in the past – it seems like I can never get ahead.
Sleeping on it didn’t help because it was top of mind when I went for my run early the next morning. Running is good for me because it allows me to clear my thoughts and gain perspective.  As I considered the medical bill the Oklahoma tornado tragedy came to mind. All of a sudden my “problem” paled in comparison to those who lost loved ones and the thousands who lost homes and possessions.
Please don’t get me wrong, I didn’t think of the Oklahoma tragedy to make myself feel better but the reality is this; no matter how good or bad we have it, someone else has it better or worse. How we’re doing depends almost entirely on what and who we compare ourselves to.
During the Principles of Persuasion workshop I talk about something called the contrast phenomenon which tells us how we experience something is directly related to what we compare it to. For example, saving $5 on a $10 item makes feel pretty good but saving $5 on a $100 item doesn’t have nearly the same effect. It’s the same $5 but how we view it is relative to something else.
Much of life is spent making comparisons:
  • How much we make
  • The house we live in
  • The car we drive

This can lead to a lot of problems and a good amount of discontent because there’s always someone who makes more, has a nicer home or car, a better looking spouse, smarter kids, etc.

My faith teaches that comparing ourselves to one another is foolish because we’re comparing to the wrong thing. If God is the standard then on one hand we’d all fall short no matter how “good” we are. Fortunately God doesn’t ask us to measure ourselves by His perfection but rather by His love. When it comes to that, He is clear – we can’t earn it and there’s nothing we’ll ever do that will make Him love us more or less.
Personally I find this freeing. No matter how productive I am today, or unproductive, no matter how well or poorly I do, nothing changes His standard. For me it means pursing whatever I do not for the accolades, money or some other external reason but rather for the enjoyment it brings me and the opportunity to help others.
So here’s my advice the next time you’re feeling blue; take a moment to explore why and ask yourself if perhaps the state you’re in has to do with comparing who you are or where you are in life to some arbitrary target. If that’s what you’re doing, then you can change the frame of reference just like I did during my morning run. The bill remains the same but I’m in a much better frame of mind and that’s priceless.
Brian, CMCT®
influencepeople 
Helping You Learn to Hear “Yes”.

When a Sale isn’t a Sale

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Do you enjoy getting a good deal? I know I do
and so do most consumers. The reality is, very seldom do we know if we’re
getting a good deal because “the deal” is always relative. For example, a $300
smart phone is a good deal when you realize the normal price is $600. In other
words, when you think you’re saving money you believe you’re getting a good
deal and that’s extra enticement when it comes to the purchasing decision.
How would you feel if you were told you were
saving 50% off of the original $300 price of luggage only to find out you saved
nothing? I know I’d be upset because it’s very likely I would have factored in
the “sale” price into my buying decision, consciously or unconsciously.
In a class action lawsuit, a California court recently said
consumers have a right to sue retailers if the price advertised is fake. Kohl’s,
the retailer involved in the suit, says its advertised price was truly a sale
and besides that, “the lawsuit was originally dismissed because a judge ruled
that the customer couldn’t sue because he hadn’t lost money by buying
merchandise that wasn’t as much of a bargain as he thought it was.”
So imagine you have the luggage and it works
as well as you expected, would you still be upset that the “sale” price was
just the price that you’d get anytime you visited the store? Would you feel
manipulated to some degree?
It’s one thing to buy something and then
realize you could have purchased it elsewhere for less – shame on you for not
doing your homework. However, should you have to do your homework to know
whether or not the store is telling you the truth about their “sale”?
In an article titled “Permission Marketing,” in
Fast Company, William C. Taylor
wrote, “This year, the average consumer will see or hear one million marketing
messages – that’s almost 3,000 per day.” Wow! Now here’s a scary thought – that
quote is 15 years old! How much more do you think you’re exposed to with the
explosion of the internet and social media? No one can possibly process it all
and that’s why so much of our decision-making happens at the subconscious
level. In fact, Martin Lindstrom, author of Buyology,
contends that 85% of what we do on a daily basis comes from unconscious
decisions.
One way we wade through the myriad of choices
comes from decision triggers, or reliable bits of information, that guide us
into what we believe are good choices. Seeing “sale” is one such trigger.
Studies show that simply by advertising a “sale” or using some other feature
like a yellow “Everyday Low Price” sticker can sometimes double sales even if the
price hasn’t changed at all.
When I teach people about influence I stress
ethics because I want students to feel good about how they apply their new
knowledge. As people work in small groups to come up with some criteria about
what constitutes an ethical request every group always mentions honesty and
truthfulness. To a person they feel if someone is going to make an ethical
attempt to persuade another individual they have to be telling the truth.
If you consider what I just shared about
decision triggers and how retail sales increase based on using the word “sale,”
do you think it’s deceptive of a store to advertise sale prices when in fact
they’re not any different that the regular prices you can get every day at the
store? In other words, if you shopped at Kohl’s every week and saw the 50% off
luggage, wouldn’t you come to realize the price is just $150 because it was
never sold for $300?
Like it or not, when we see a sale being
advertised it gets us into stores far more than if there was no sale. Once
we’re in the store we buy more so wouldn’t it be nice to know we’re truly
getting the good deal that’s advertised?
Brian, CMCT®
influencepeople 
Helping You Learn to Hear “Yes”.