An Education in How to Apply Persuasion to a School Levy

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Many years ago I wrote a blog post that was one of my best read. It even caught the attention of Jeffrey Gitomer and he ran it in his weekly Caffeine Ezine. The article was called 700,000 Great Reasons to Use Yellow Sticky Notes. It showed how we took a concept from the book Yes: 50 Scientifically Proven Ways to be Persuasive and implemented it to recover from a $700,000 mistake quickly.

The person I worked with to make that happen was our home office accounting manager Steve Ruble. Steve recently told me he was taking the concept of personalizing information into a school levy campaign in his town. He said if the levy failed there would be many more cuts than residents realized. Being a big school supporter and having children in the school system, Steve had a vested interest in making sure this didn’t happen. The odds were against the levy as none had passed since 2010.

Working with other supporters of the school levy they were able to identify 2,000 people who hadn’t voted in the last levy ballot. A frequently asked questions (FAQs) flier was delivered to these people. On the FAQ was a section highlighted in yellow that read, “Please Vote Yes.” Steve personally signed all 2,000, writing “Thank You” next to the highlighted section.

Now you might be thinking something as trivial as a personalized note would have no effect on your decision to vote, let alone to vote yes on the levy. You would not be alone in that thought, but much of persuasion happens at the subconscious level, meaning it impacts you without you actively thinking about it.

In the studies cited in Yes, both times signed sticky notes were used the response rate doubled. When a hand written note was used without a sticky note the response rate was still 33% higher. You can’t explain away those results in a controlled experiment.

Back to my friend Steve – he had seen the difference it makes to personalize requests to our agents when it came to money and he knew it worked. That’s why he made sure the Please Vote Yes was highlighted in yellow and that’s why he endured writer’s cramp to sign 2,000 FAQs!

Quite often elections come down to a few percentage points and in small towns that might mean a few hundred swing voters can make the difference.In Steve’s case the levy passed by a whopping 74% to 26% margin!

Did the personalization – an application of the principle of reciprocity – make all the difference? Perhaps not all the difference, but Steve knew it could be a big part of the difference they would need to pass the levy and he was wise enough not to let the opportunity slip by.

Whenever you want to persuade someone – to get them to do something they’re not doing at the moment – take a moment to personalize your request and your odds of hearing yes will be much better.

Brian Ahearn, CMCT®
Chief Influence Officer
influencePEOPLE 
Helping You Learn to Hear “Yes”.

Drive for Show, Putt for Dough

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My wife is a heck of a golfer. She’s the poster child for the power of golf lessons and practice. About ten years ago, she was a very average golfer, shooting between 100 and 110. After years of lessons, practice, and consistent play, she’s transformed her game to the point where she consistently shoots in the low 80s and occasionally in the upper 70s.

Last year, she had a pressure match and played her best round of the year. The pressure? Playing 18 holes with rock legend Alice Cooper, who happens to be a scratch golfer. That day, Cooper shot a 75, and Jane had a season-best 78. Needless to say, he was impressed!

There’s an old saying in golf: “Drive for show, putt for dough.” Crushing a drive off the tee is impressive, but to be a great golfer, it comes down to play around the green—particularly putting. That’s because putting accounts for approximately 40%–50% of a golfer’s score. For example, a par-four hole may be anywhere from 400 to 475 yards. A good golfer will reach the green in two shots, then most likely take two more strokes to putt the ball 20–30 feet into the hole.

Persuasion is a lot like putting. It doesn’t seem like something that should take too much time or practice because it usually comes at the end of a long process. However, when viewed as critically as putting, it deserves a tremendous amount of time and attention.

Daniel Pink, author of To Sell Is Human, cited a study where more than 7,000 businesspeople were asked how much of their time was spent in non-sales selling (i.e., persuading). The answer was 40%! That’s right—apart from selling, businesspeople estimate they spend 40% of their time, or 3.2 hours a day, trying to persuade other people to do things.

If you spent 40% of your day (or more, if you’re in sales or leadership) engaged in a particular activity, wouldn’t it make sense to devote time and effort to improving in that area? Of course, it would!

Great golfers spend an inordinate amount of time on the putting green because tournaments are usually won and lost on crucial putts. If your job requires you to sell, work with others, or work through others, then you’re like the pro golfer—you should be working on your putting (persuading).

Leaders – Whether you’re a supervisor, manager, or senior-level executive, your success depends on the performance of your team. Your ability to get them to buy into your vision and execute it enthusiastically is vital to your success.

Salespeople – Success for you culminates in a “Yes” from prospects and current clients. Understanding how to communicate in a way that makes “Yes” come easier and faster will impact your income through commissions earned.

Not in sales or management – Undoubtedly, you still need assistance and cooperation. You may need coworkers, suppliers, vendors, or even your boss to do certain things. Knowing how to ethically influence these groups can make your days much, much easier.

At home – Life is much more pleasant when your spouse, roommates, children, and neighbors more willingly go along with what you propose.

Whether you’re looking for professional success or personal happiness, I believe understanding how to ethically persuade others will go a long way—longer than any drive off the tee—in helping you achieve that success and happiness.

Drive for show but persuade for dough!

Brian Ahearn, CMCT®
Chief Influence Officer
influencePEOPLE 
Helping You Learn to Hear “Yes”.

 

Influencers from Around the World – Some Acts of Giving Can Span Decades and Lifetimes

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This month we have another new guest writer. Like
myself and several other guest bloggers for Influence PEOPLE, Debbie Hixson is
a Cialdini Method Certified Trainer®.
Debbie is a manager in the Leader Strategy and Programs division at Kaiser
Permanente where she’s been for nearly 20 years. She earned her B.A.,
Psychology, has an M.Ed. in Counseling and Educational Psychology, a Masters of
Arts in Human Resources Development and is currently working on her
Ph.D. in Organizational Leadership! I know you’ll enjoy Debbie’s insightful
perspective on influence and persuasion.
Brian Ahearn, CMCT® 
Chief Influence Officer
influencePEOPLE 
Helping You Learn to Hear “Yes”.


Some Acts of Giving Can Span
Decades and Lifetimes
I read in my Sunday paper about a cemetery in Holland where
American soldiers who fought the Nazis in World War II are buried.  It seems that each of the 8,300 graves in
Margraten, a small village in the Netherlands, are tended by Dutch, Belgian or
German families, along with schools, companies, and military organizations. On
Memorial Day this year they came as they do several times a year to place
flowers in front of headstones of people they didn’t know and to honor their
service.
At the
cemetery’s annual commemoration 6,000 people flooded the 65-acre burial grounds
including many descendants of the American soldiers who traveled from all over
the U.S. They came to pay tribute to their parents and grandparents who fought
to defeat the Nazis. And they came to thank the people who had been tending the
graves of their loved ones for over 70 years. Some of the caretakers have passed
the responsibility on from generation to generation. The responsibility is felt
so deeply that there is a list of over 100 people waiting to become caretakers
of the graves.
What would
cause a nation recovering from the trauma of being invaded during World War II and
their own personal losses to adopt the fallen of another nation? And what would
keep this commitment alive all these years later, when the pain and significance
of the war had faded. It is unique in this world, wouldn’t you say?
In
September 1944, the village of Margraten and its 1,500 inhabitants had been
freed from Nazi occupation. The war was not over and many American soldiers
died in nearby battles with the goal of breaking through the German lines and
trying to capture bridges that connected the Netherlands to Germany. The losses
sustained were heavy and the American nation needed a place to bury its dead.
They choose a fruit orchard just outside Margraten.
The villagers
of Margraten embraced the Americans and grieved for their fallen. They provided
food and shelter for the U.S. commanders and their troops. After four years of
being occupied by the Nazis, they were free. Life could return to normal and
once again they could enjoy the freedoms they had before the invasion. They
realized that they had the Americans to thank for that freedom.
For the
gift of their freedom, the people of Margraten reciprocated by tending year
after year to the graves of the solders who gave their lives to restore it. The
rule of reciprocity, according to Dr. Robert Cialdini,
says that when we receive something, a favor, a kindness, etc., we feel obligated
to repay it. He says that “so typical is it for indebtedness to accompany the
receipt of such things that a phrase like ‘much obliged’ has become a synonym
for ‘thank you,” not only in the English language but in others as well.” Although
obligations extend into the future they can be short lived unless they are notable
and memorable such as the American sacrifice to free the people of Margraten.
In some cases such as this, the obligation is felt so keenly that the thank you
never ends.
We can
see this illustrated in a recent ceremony in Margraten to honor the fallen
Americans. One American conveyed the essence of the bond between the Dutch and
the U.S. His name is Arthur Chotin and the Naaijken family tends his father’s
grave. He said to the audience of Americans and current caretakers, “By making
these dead part of your family, you have become part of our family. You have
created a bond between us that will never be broken. So, from this day forward,
from now until the end of time, a heartfelt thank you.”
In our
own lives we have experienced reciprocity. We all learned as children that when
someone does something nice for us, we do something nice for that someone in
return. It works well for us and in our society to reciprocate. We have not-so-nice
words for people who do not reciprocate. Reciprocating with others establishes
relationships whether they are professional or personal in nature. 
In my
work, I use reciprocity to develop long-lasting relationships with my clients
that are mutually beneficial. Before I make a request of them, I consider
giving them something first. It might be giving time to listen to their concerns,
or sharing ideas to address their problems. In return I ask for their trust to
be completely honest in our coaching relationship. Then I ask them to listen to
my feedback as well as try out my suggestions for addressing their leadership
challenges. Because we keep reciprocating the relationship continues
indefinitely for as long as we work together.
Reciprocity
is a powerful tool to influence others. It is based on the idea that we help
those who help us. It begins by giving someone a gift – your time, your advice,
etc. In turn they will usually support your request because the rule says we’re
to give back to those who first give to us. It is a powerful motivator for us
to comply with other’s requests when they have given to us and it’s powerful
because others will do what you ask when you give to them first.
So start
with this thought, “Whom can I help?” rather than, “Who can help me?” Do so and
you will initiate and develop long-lasting, mutually beneficial relationships. Try
it.

Debbie
Hixson, CMCT®

What’s in a Name?

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“What’s in a name? That which we call a rose by any other name would smell as sweet.” That famous quote comes from William Shakespeare’s play Romeo and Juliet. Juliet utters that line to Romeo as she makes the point that no matter his name (he was a Montague and his family was at odds with Juliet’s family, the Capulets) he is still the man she loves.

It’s a well-known line that does contain an element of truth because the rose would smell every bit as sweet no matter what we called it. However, if we renamed the rose something like “The Dogcrap Flower,” very few people would be willing to even sniff it.

This understanding came to light recently when I approached an individual about an idea I had. I wanted to rename something but I knew this person was heavily invested in the current name. Here’s how I approached the conversation:

Me – Have you ever had Patagonian Toothfish?

Other – (making an “ewe gross” sound) No, I

don’t think I have. Sounds kind of gross.

Me – Have you tried Chilean Seabass?

Other – Yes, I love it.

Me – Did you know they’re the same thing? (I hear a chuckle). Nobody was buying Patagonian Toothfish because it sounds bad so they renamed it Chilean Seabass in the 1970s. I bring this up because I think we have a naming problem.

From there I described the problem and the other person agreed rather quickly to explore the name change.

Aside from an example like that, names, words and labels matter a lot! And it doesn’t always matter what the dictionary has to say about what a word means because ultimately we give meaning to words. Understanding your audience and their interpretation of words is what matters most. Here are a few examples.

Thug – a violent criminal (Merriam-Webster)

We heard this word used repeatedly in connection with the recent Baltimore riots. It’s true that those who looted and destroyed were violent criminals. However, many people came down hard on those who used the word – including Baltimore’s mayor and President Obama (both African-American) – because in society the word has become more closely associated with African-Americans. There was a time when the word was used to describe Irish immigrant criminals, gangsters in the 1920s and 1930s, and even former Detroit Piston center Bill Lambier. But the connotation in today’s media is so heavily skewed towards African-Americans that it’s becoming a race-related word.

Niggardly – hating to spend money, very small amount (Merriam-Webster)

In 1999 David Howard used this word when referring to the budget for Washington D.C. and was relieved of his position after a race-related complaint. Eventually he took a different position working for the city and said he learned from the incident.

Bastard – a person born to parents not married to each other (TheFreeDictionary.com)

We can probably all think of someone we know who was born to parents who never married. If you used this word to describe that someone you’d probably get popped in the mouth or get an earful of condemnation for being insensitive. Most people in that situation would have no problem talking about their parents never marrying but would not take kindly to the label.

There was an urban legend about the Chevy Nova not selling in Spanish speaking countries because in Spanish Nova means “no go.” There was no truth to the story but it too belies the point that a name can have a profound impact on the listener.

What does this have to do with persuasion? A lot! Understanding your audience – what words will help and what words will offend – and keeping in mind your ultimate goal will help you craft your persuasive message.

Do we want to see race relations improve in this country? I believe the vast majority of people would say yes.

Tossing around the word thug, when you know how it will be perceived, is not something a smart persuader would do. If an African-American mayor and president can’t avoid controversy then neither will you.

Budgets may be tight but the wise persuader would not use the word niggardly – no matter how the dictionary defines it – because they realize someone will be offended and their message will be lost.

If you want to help tackle the issue of children being born out of wedlock you best not refer to those children as bastards because you’ll offend so many people that your desire to help and good ideas will never be heard.

Yes, a rose by any other name would smell as sweet but rename it incorrectly and almost nobody will take a sniff. The words we use can make all the difference so make sure your words work for you, not against you.

If You are Wrong – Tom Brady – Admit it Quickly and Emphatically

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I don’t know about you, but I’m sick and tired of athletes getting caught red-handed cheating or involved in some scandal only to defiantly maintain their innocence. Pete Rose, Lance Armstrong, and A-Rod come to mind, and now Tom Brady has joined the list. Eventually, the truth comes out, and each person only compounded his problems with the lies that ensued.

Of course, this issue isn’t limited to just athletes. We’ve all seen our fair share of politicians, religious leaders, businesspeople, and many others go through the same thing.

Just once, I’d like to hear someone say, “I did it. It was wrong. No excuses, and now I’m willing to bear whatever punishment comes my way.”

The public doesn’t care why they did what they did because it’s all excuses. My old high school football coach said it best: “Excuses are like a—holes. Everybody has one, and they all stink!” The only thing people care about is what they did.

Lying after getting caught only compounds cheating. Hence the well-known saying, “The cover-up is worse than the crime.”

When will they learn? I realize a lot is at stake, but had each of the aforementioned people taken their medicine when they were caught, odds are they’d be back in the good graces of the public by now. Tiger Woods, as horrible as his behavior was, fessed up, sought help, and is in a much better place than Pete, Lance, A-Rod, or Tom.

Football is a game of inches. Sometimes the slightest advantage makes all the difference between winning and losing. But the point is not whether deflating a football a little bit makes a difference or whether fans and players think the rule is silly—IT’S THE RULE.

The issue with Tom Brady is twofold. First, he chose to break the rule and only did so because he felt it would be an advantage for him. If he didn’t think balls with slightly less pressure would help, he wouldn’t have instructed others to let a little air out. Like the rule or not, he knowingly broke it.

Second, and more important now, he lied about it. For most people, when everything is on the line, we see their true character. Sometimes people choose to risk life and limb for others, but most people focus just on themselves. That’s the choice Tom Brady made.

In Dale Carnegie’s classic How to Win Friends and Influence People, he has some great advice under the section Be a Leader (something Tom Brady is supposed to be):

“When you’re wrong, admit it quickly and emphatically.”

Carnegie’s advice taps into Robert Cialdini’s principle of authority. One shortcut to gain credibility with others is to admit weakness or mistakes before the other person brings them up. In doing so, you’re viewed as more truthful.

If I were in the NFL, I might get flagged for a 15-yard penalty for “piling on” with this blog post. I don’t dislike Tom Brady or the New England Patriots. In fact, I was pulling for them to win the Super Bowl years ago when they had a chance to go undefeated because it would have been a historic event. But no longer can I root for them at all because it seems that at every turn, Tom Brady, Bill Belichick, and the organization are embroiled in controversy over the rules. When there’s smoke, there’s usually fire. Admit you started the fire and do all you can to prevent any more from starting!

Here’s my final thought: Tom Brady needs to grow a pair and take his punishment like a man. Of course, maybe he already has a pair, but if so, then they’re obviously a bit deflated too.

Brian Ahearn, CMCT®
Chief Influence Officer
influencePEOPLE 
Helping You Learn to Hear “Yes”.

 

Setting the Stage for a Successful Sales Call

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Have you ever been interrupted at home by an unexpected salesperson ringing your doorbell? You know the type—the kind who shows up unannounced and launches into a pitch before you’ve had a chance to blink. If you’re like most people, it’s not your favorite experience. So, here’s the real question: Why do salespeople do this to their business customers?

Imagine this scenario: Salesperson: “Hi Pat. I was in the area and thought I’d pop in. Do you have a few minutes to talk? I’d love to tell you about…blah, blah, blah.”

We’ve all been on the receiving end of this approach, and often, we nod along, not because we’re interested but because we don’t want to seem rude. Here’s the harsh truth for the salesperson: the prospect isn’t listening. Instead, they’re wondering why they didn’t say they were too busy—and counting the minutes until the conversation ends.

The key to a successful sales call lies in setting the stage. You want to be in front of people who genuinely want to see you, who believe you might help them or their business. This requires more than just showing up—it demands thoughtful preparation and a bit of psychology.

1. Start with Courtesy: Schedule the Call

Common courtesy goes a long way. Instead of showing up unannounced, reach out by phone to schedule a meeting. This approach is not only respectful but also allows you to share a bit about why you want to meet and learn about any specific needs they might have.

Example:
“Hi Pat, it’s Jim. I was wondering if we could find a time to connect. I’d love to hear how things are going and share some insights I think you’ll find valuable.”

Making this initial contact sets the stage. It gives your client time to think about you, your company, and your offerings. It also increases the chances of a productive meeting because both parties come prepared.

2. Follow Up Immediately: Prime Your Prospect

After scheduling the meeting, follow up with an email. Thank them for their time, confirm the date and time, and share relevant information to review beforehand. Here’s where you can tap into a powerful psychological principle: Consistency. When you ask if they’ll review the material and they say “yes,” the chances they will actually do it go up significantly.

Try this:
“Thanks for setting aside time to meet next Tuesday at 2:30 p.m. To get the most out of our conversation, would you take a few minutes to look at the link below?”

Consistency is key because people feel both internal and external pressure to align their actions with their words. When they say they’ll do something, they are more likely to follow through.

3. Prime Them Before the Meeting

The idea of priming (a.k.a. pre-suasion) involves exposing someone to information beforehand to influence how they think and behave later. By sharing information ahead of time, you guide your client’s mindset before you even step into the room.

On the day of the meeting, resend your original email as a gentle reminder. If they haven’t looked at the information yet, this nudge can be just enough to prompt them to do so.

4. Kick Off the Meeting with Empathy

When the meeting begins, thank them again for their time. Before jumping into your presentation, ask what’s on their mind. This not only shows respect but also gives you valuable insight into their needs and concerns.

5. Close the Loop: Send a Follow-Up Email

After the meeting, send a follow-up email. Summarize key points, confirm any agreed-upon actions, and provide clarity if there was any miscommunication. This step not only reinforces your professionalism but also ensures everyone is on the same page moving forward.

Give It a Try—Your Clients Will Thank You

I challenge you to give this approach a shot. Your clients (and potential clients) will appreciate your respect for their time. You’ll also benefit from a more productive meeting, as your prospect will have had multiple opportunities to think about your offer.

Sales isn’t about pushing your product or service—it’s about creating an environment where people want to say “yes.” A little preparation and psychology can go a long way in turning your next sales call into a winning conversation.

Revised and edited with ChatGPT 3/8/25

Brian Ahearn, CMCT®
Chief Influence Officer
influencePEOPLE 
Helping You Learn to Hear “Yes”

Influencers from Around the World – The Power of Influential Questions

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I met Dan Norris in August 2004 when I attended the Principles of Persuasion Workshop®. Dan was the workshop facilitator and did a terrific job. He’s been a Cialdini Method Certified Trainer, one of less than two-dozen worldwide, for 15 years. In addition to being a CMCT®Dan has been the Director of Training for HOLT CAT since 2003. I invited him to contribute to Influence PEOPLE because of his vast knowledge of ethical influence. I know you’ll enjoy his writing and learn a lot from his post. If you’d like to connect with Dan reach out to him on LinkedInor Twitter.

The Power of Influential Questions
I can admit it freely now:  I’m a notorious eavesdropper.  Whether at an airport, grocery store, or restaurant, I delight in listening to the discussions of others.  I try to soak up every juicy detail, every interpersonal conflict, and every persuasive pitch that reaches my ears.  It’s amazing what people will actually discuss in public—topics ranging from the mundane to the downright absurd.  I like to believe I’m a student of human behavior, but the truth is, I’m just really nosey.

Over time, I learned more than just the latest gossip:  I realized people spent the majority of their time “telling” others what they thought and very little time asking questions.  In many cases, we spend enormous amounts of energy arguing points others already agree with.  We are just too busy “telling” to listen to what others have to say.

I reflected on myself. Was I any different?  (Spoiler alert: Nope.) I thought about all the times I belted out what I thought I needed to say.  I’d deceive myself and say “I’m just telling you how it is,” oblivious to others needs or perspective. Looking back, it took me significantly longer to get things done when I would “cut to the chase” and tell.  All too often, I felt I had to rehash issues several times before they were finally resolved.

Of course, I used to think others were slow or didn’t “get it.”  The truth is that I was the slow one.  My lack of questions and assumptions made it exceptionally difficult for me to hear what others were saying—and modify my behavior accordingly.

After this realization, I read every book I could find on questioning and communication.  I attended seminar after seminar on the subject. I also spent mentored with people who asked great questions (I’m looking at you, Larry Mills!).  It made a tremendous difference in my life—especially in terms of how I influenced others.

One memorable example of how questioning changed my influence approach came while coaching an employee named Harvey. At the time I was the new director of training at a large equipment dealership. It was common for me to spend time coaching others to reach their developmental goals.

However, this situation was different.  The supervisor shared with me the person frequently made disparaging remarks about his co-workers, and appeared to have a very “negative attitude.”  At the end of describing the employee’s behaviors, the manager leaned forward and curtly shared that “This is his last shot.  I’ve told him A THOUSAND TIMES that he needs to change and he hasn’t.  If you can’t help him, he’s out.”

I gave the meeting a lot of thought.  In the past, I would use the same template that many others use—tell the employee they have a problem, tell them what the problem is, and tell them what will happen if the problem isn’t resolved.  They would reluctantly agree to the findings of the meeting and leave. Sometimes they changed…sometimes they didn’t.

Then it hit me—his supervisor probably “told” him 999 times too many.  Despite failing each time, his supervisor continued to use the ineffective approach of “telling.”  I’m sure it lead Harvey to be as frustrated as his supervisor.

I decided to use questions in this coaching session to change the direction and try to salvage the working relationships.  To avoid falling back on my “telling” habits, I made a list of all the things I could gain by asking questions:

Questions reveal information I don’t already know.

“Telling” only shares information I’m familiar with…it doesn’t reveal how others are feeling, their perspective, or provide opportunities to influence.  Questions help me better listen to the needs, interests, and positions of others.

Questions influence others to make commitments.

When I ask questions of others, they make commitments about what they feel and believe.  If I say what needs to happen, others can doubt me. If I get others to tell me what needs to happen, they feel more committed to the solution.  Dr. Robert Cialdini’s landmark book Influence: Science and Practicecalls this the Principle of Consistency.

Questions involve others in the conversation

Telling pushes people away. Questions invite others into the discussion.  People want to express themselves and be heard.  They are more likely to listen to me if I listen to them first.

Questions influence people to reframe how they view the situation.

Questions are highly persuasive.  They are excellent ways to ethically influence others to experience private, inner changes about how they view a situation.  Another take away from Dr. Cialdini’s work.

I reflected on these four reminders.  “That makes sense,” I thought.  “Now how the hell do I use it?”  Channeling sage advice from a dear mentor, I resolved to write down several questions ahead of our conversation to prepare.

When the time came, Harvey sat down sheepishly in my office.  I could see in his eyes that he expected another didactic lecture about his behavior. After offering him some water, I pulled up a chair next to him.

“Thanks for meeting with me, Harvey. Before we get started, would you mind if I asked you some questions?”

“Sure,” said Harvey in a skeptical tone.

“How clear do you think I am about what happens in your department on a daily basis?”

Harvey tilted his head and appeared surprised by the question.  “I suppose you don’t know a lot about what goes on directly…probably only what you’ve heard.”

“I’d certainly agree with that,” I said.  “What role do you see me playing in our company?”

Harvey thought some more. “Well, you’re the training guy.  I guess you’re responsible for helping people grow and get better.”

“You’re right,” I replied. “I work with people at all levels of the company on their performance.  Since you and I don’t work closely together, I want to make sure I have some clarity about your goals before we move forward.  I wouldn’t want to make any recommendations without understanding your plans for growth.  How does that work for you?”

“Makes sense,” he replied. His body language became more relaxed. His shoulders dropped, and he became more comfortable in his chair.

“Great,” I said.  “Now I hope you stay with us for your whole career. Whether you work for the company for five, 10, or even the next 30 years—what do you want your legacy to be? How do you want to be known?”

Harvey paused in thought for a moment.  “Nobody’s ever asked me that.  I guess I would like to be the ‘go to’ person.  I’d like to be the person that others would trust coaching new employees or handling difficult tasks.  I want to be the person that is a ‘slam dunk’ for the next promotion.”

“I’m sure you have the talent to do so,” I replied.  “That said, I’d like to ask you another question:  When you use disparaging and negative language about others, how does that match the vision you just described?”

He paused as his eyes widened. “I never thought about it like that. I guess it doesn’t.”

“You’re right,” I acknowledged.  “How does that behavior position you as the next best leadership candidate?”

He began shaking his head. “Well, I guess it doesn’t make me a strong candidate.  I never thought of it that way.  I was just trying to be funny—I didn’t mean to upset anyone.”

It was clear that Harvey was beginning to see things differently.  “The past is the past, Harvey.  We all make mistakes or send messages to others that we don’t intend. Going forward, what are some things you might do to change your behavior?”

Harvey began discussing ideas that he could change.  His entire demeanor changed.  He became energized and focused.  He wanted to make the changes.  He wanted to fit the vision he had for himself.  We talked for some time as he created an action plan for himself.

I had one final question before we ended our meeting. “I know that you’re the type of person that can make changes like this happen.  There is no doubt your capable of rebranding yourself.  However, I think it’s important to reflect on what may happen if you choose not to change.  If you don’t go through with these changes, what the consequences would you expect?”

Harvey sat back in his chair thinking.  “Well,” he thought, “I imagine I’d be up for disciplinary action.  I’d expect to be written up.”

I was floored—his honesty was as surprising as it was refreshing.  I committed to support and coach him.  He was energized and ready to work on his relationships with others.  I called his supervisor to fill him in on our discussion. He was dumfounded.  He couldn’t believe Harvey was receptive.  He laughed and said, “I’ll believe it when I see it.”

Harvey did change —dramatically.  He took ownership for his behavior and worked very hard to repair the relationships he had with others.  Harvey had no idea how his behavior affected others.  True to his vision, he now leads others and is a sought after coach.

Dr. Cialdini’s Principle of Consistency—influencing others to make a choice or take a stand on an issue—was the primary reason Harvey changed his behavior.  Questions revealed new information, involved Harvey in the conversation, influenced him to make commitments, and reframed how we all saw the situation.  It ethically changed the way we viewed the situation and provided a win-win for everyone involved.

I’m sure you have a “Harvey” in your life.  What questions are you asking them?

Dan Norris, CMCT®

 

Dan Norris, CMCT®

“Improv” Your Sales with Improv Comedy

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For Jane’s 50th birthday, her big surprise gift was an eight-week workshop on Improv comedy for the two of us. Believe me, she was surprised! I thought it would be a great to experience it together, that we’d meet interesting people, and that we’d laugh a lot. Mission accomplished on all fronts! The course concluded with a show at The Funny Bone Comedy Club in Columbus. Working with 10 people in a safe space week after week is different than doing a live show in front of friends, family and strangers, so we were both a little nervous. But, we had so much fun we signed up for another course and concluded our second Improv show in late February.

As I reflected on the Improv experiences we enjoyed together, I saw interesting parallels between Improv comedy and sales. Even if you don’t consider yourself a salesperson the reality is every one of us sells ideas and ourselves daily.

Practice

I can’t imagine reading a few books on Improv or following a blog for a period of time then trying to perform in front of a live audience. Practicing in a safe space with a teacher was a huge confidence builder for all of us. And we learned quite a bit from one another as we observed each other on stage. Salespeople traditionally hate anything remotely close to role-play and think reading about sales or attending a seminar will give them all they need to succeed. Wrong! The more you role-play the readier you are for a sales call as long as your scenarios are realistic. I’ve also seen where salespeople learn as much, if not more, from each other during the training.

Unscripted

Improv is short for improvisational comedy, which is unscripted. When you improvise you are creating in the moment and Improv is all about taking what’s given to you then creating a funny reality. Quite often audience members shout out people, places and things leaving those on stage to use their imagination to construct a funny scene. You don’t know what will be thrown at you when you’re onstage and it’s the same when it comes to sales. You never know exactly what might come up before, during or after a sales call. Quite often you don’t know what objections you might be hit with during a sale so you need to be comfortable responding in the moment. The longer you’re in sales the more situations and objections you face and the more comfortable you are dealing with whatever comes at you. Just as more practice and performances help comedians, so it is with salespeople.

Study

Great comedians don’t just wing it even though they might improvise. Through study and observation, they learn what makes something funny and why some jokes fall flat. They draw from the world around them so the audience can relate and understand their jokes. Imagine a comedian making jokes about King Henry the 8th and England in the 16th century. That probably won’t go over as well as jokes related to the present and politicians people know something about. By the same token, good salespeople understand their customers, their needs and speak to both. Good salespeople study their craft and learn how to speak persuasively so the
customer “gets it” just like the audience gets a joke.

Timing

Timing is crucial in comedy. Two comedians can tell the same joke but how they set it up, how they deliver the punch line and exactly when they deliver the punch line can make all the difference between laughter and silence. Selling is very similar.

Two salespeople can say essentially the same thing and for one person it comes across in a natural, conversational way but for the other it feels like a pushy salesman. Timing is also very important when it comes to closing a sale. When to close can vary based on many things and there is some “art” as to what you do to close the deal. Do it too early and prospective customers recoil because the feel like they’re being sold. As Jeffery Gitomer likes to say, “People don’t like to be sold but they love to buy.”

Yes, and… 

When people hear Improv comedy one of the first things you’ll hear them say is, “Yes, and…” Improv is much more than this little phrase but it’s one of the first concepts you’re taught. In order to make a scene work you’re told to take whatever is given to you and build on it. Nothing kills a scene quicker than rejecting what someone has said or done. Sales is similar in that shutting someone down, rejecting what they say, insisting they’re wrong and you’re right, is a sure way to alienate customers. “Yes, I can understand why you feel that way and…” then transition into something to hopefully get the other person to start seeing things differently.

So, if you want to succeed in Improv or sales remember to be PUSTY (Practice, Unscripted, Study, Timing, Yes). And one more thought to consider: Everything I just shared applies to parenting. Give what I just shared a quick reread and see if you get what I mean. Most of us are not handed a training manual when we become parents so we figure out quite a bit as we go along. I believe these same principles I’ve just outlined can help you be a better parent.

Interested in learning more about Improv? If you live in the Columbus metro area I encourage you to reach out to Jeff Gage. He was a great teacher and it was apparent he loves what he does because, despite doing this for decades, he laughed as much as anyone during our workshops and shows. Reach out to him to see when his next classes will be held. It’s guaranteed you’ll have fun, meet interesting people, and laugh a lot. There’s not much better in life than that!

Brian Ahearn, CMCT®
Chief Influence Officer
influencePEOPLE 
Helping You Learn to Hear “Yes”.

 

The Psychology of the Sales Cycle – Referrals

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For the most part salespeople don’t have a great reputation. This is so because many people feel they’ll be pressured into buying something they don’t want or need by someone who is manipulating them. I teach sales and don’t always like dealing with salespeople because most of the time they don’t add value to the transaction. If someone can only tell me what I can already read on online or find on a label, then they’re not doing me much good. Good salespeople add value because they:

  • Ask questions to help uncover a need you might not have considered before.
  • Save you the time and effort of having to do lots and lots of research on your own.
  • Point out features you might not have known about and demonstrate how they’ll be beneficial for you.
  • Can be a “go to” person for you when something goes awry.

When you interact with someone who really helps you, it’s natural to want to help him or her in return. That’s the principle of reciprocity and it will make the client happy to help you by giving you some referrals.

It’s common for salespeople to ask for referrals at the close of the sale.

“John, I’m really glad we’re doing business together. One way my business grows is through referrals. Do you know anyone else who might be interested in the services I offer?”

Personally I think that’s a terrible approach because you’ve not done anything yet to deliver on your promise! If the client doesn’t say no right off the bat it’s likely to be met with a name or two off the top of their head quickly just to satisfy you.

Here is an approach that combines the principles of reciprocity and consistency that is sure to get more and better referrals! You disarm the client by telling them you’re not going to ask for referrals but would like to ask a favor. Ask if you can talk sometime in the future about referrals, after they’ve had a chance to see how your product or service performs. This is where planning comes in because you’re planting a seed. Here’s what I recommend to insurance agents. I’m sure some variation might work for you in your business:

“John, I’m really glad we’re doing business together. At this point in the sales process I know a lot of insurance agents would ask for referrals but don’t worry, I’m not going to do that. I would like to ask a favor though. After you’ve had a chance to experience our service, say nine months to a year from now, if we’ve done what we said we would and you’re happy with us, could we talk about referrals at that time?”

Humans are funny in many ways and one is our willingness to put things off into the future that we’d rather not do today. I guarantee nearly everyone will agree to talk with you in 9-12 months about referrals.

Now it’s up to you to have an efficient diary system for following up with clients.

“John, it’s Sue. I’m calling to see how things are going and if there’s anything you need from me as we approach your renewal date?”

Towards the end of that conversation try this:

“John, do you remember when we started doing business together last year? I asked if we could talk about referrals if we’d lived up to our promises and you were happy. I feel we’ve done that (reciprocity). Are you happy with the decision you made to move your business to us?”

Don’t just ask for names and numbers at this point because the customer will be scrambling. They were not thinking about referrals when they picked up the phone, so continue in this way:

“I don’t want to take any more of your time today and I’d like to give you a chance to think about who might appreciate the kinds of things we’ve done for you. Could we set a time next week to talk for about 15 minutes?”

You’ve planted the seed for them to really give this thought and they will because they told you they would. On next week’s call you’re sure to get the names of people who would be most likely to appreciate what you have to offer.

This is the final post in this series where we’ve looked at using particular principles of influence at different points in the sales cycle. I hope you’ve found the posts enlightening but more importantly, that you employ what you’ve learned and see your sales soar as a result!

The Psychology of the Sales Cycle – Closing

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I remember when I was young and single I would go out with friends and see pretty girls, but rarely had the gumption to go up and talk to them. The reason was fear of rejection. Nobody likes that feeling so we do what we can to avoid that possible self-inflicted wound.

In the same way I was afraid to talk to a pretty girl, salespeople are reluctant to ask for the sale for fear of rejection. It’s safer for the ego to let the prospect “think it over and get back to you.” In their uncertainty, prospects do one of two things: 1) take the safe route and don’t change anything, or 2) go with the salesperson who fearlessly asked them if they could start on the paperwork.

The number one question salespeople ask during The Principles of Persuasion Workshop® is, “What’s the best way to close?” My standard response is, “The best way to close starts the moment you meet prospects for the first time, look them in the eye and shake their hand.” From that point forward how easy or difficult closing is depends on what you do. I believe closing the sale should just be a natural part of the ongoing conversation with a prospect. The best compliment a salesperson can hear from a client is, “I never felt like I was being sold.”

Early on in this series I quoted Jeffrey Gitomer, “All things being equal, people want to do business with their friends. All things being not so equal, people still want to do business with their friends.” Tapping into liking early and often will make a big difference by the time you ask for the business. Always start your contact with a prospect on a social level bonding over things you have in common and looking for opportunities to offer genuine compliments.

The more you’ve done for the prospect and the more you’ve gone out of your way on their behalf, the more likely they are to look for some way to give back to you. If you’re unable to close the deal for some reason you might still leverage all you’ve done as a way to get some referrals because of reciprocity.

People want to know they’re doing business with an expert because it gives them more confidence in their decision. As you make your way through the sales process, show yourself to be professional and someone your prospects can rely on for answers when they need them. In short, tap into authority.

I believe consistency is the most important principle to tap into during the closing. Reminding people of what they said is a powerful motivator of behavior! This is where the upfront close comes in handy early in the sales cycle. At some point during the initial meeting or qualification stage you need to find out exactly what it will take for you to earn the right to do business with the prospect. If you know you can’t meet their requirements, cut your losses and move on. But, if you believe you can meet the requirements you might want to say something like this: “Shirley, from what you’ve shared it sounds like if we can meet your specifications at the agreed upon price by the delivery date you mentioned, we’ll be doing business, correct?”

You want the prospect to come back with: “Correct. Meet those specs at that price by the delivery date we discussed and you have a deal.”

This is also the time to confirm there are no other hidden reasons that might crop up to kill the deal: “Just to be very clear Shirley, are there any other reasons I’m unaware of that could get in the way of us doing business?”

Again, you want her to confirm what you’re asking. When it comes time to close you only need to refer back to what you’ve already agreed on: “Shirley, great news. We can meet the specs at the price we discussed and can even deliver a little earlier than you requested. Can we go ahead and start the paperwork so we can get everything in motion?”

It would be very hard for Shirley to come back and say no at this point after you’ve done everything she asked for. Will there be times when someone backs out? Sure. But, using consistency in an approach like this will have more people saying yes and will make it much easier and natural for you to seal the deal.

Last, but not least, is scarcity. Pointing out what someone might save or gain by going with your proposal will not be as persuasive as honestly sharing what they stand to lose by not taking the step you recommend. For example, if you are in financial services, talking about how much more someone might be able to save for retirement by setting aside an extra percent of their income will not be as motivating as sharing what they will lose if they don’t save a little extra.

Ineffective – “Ed, if we can find a way to set aside just 1% more you’re going to have more than $100,000 extra in the bank by the time you retire.”

Effective – “Ed, if we can’t find a way to set aside just 1% more you’re going to lose out on more than $100,000 by the time you retire.”

Hopefully these examples of weaving the principles of influence into the sales process will take some of the fear out of closing. There’s one more post in this series – asking for referrals. Next week we’ll look at ways to make that happen as naturally as the close, by effectively working the principles of influence into your sales cycle.