Tag Archive for: Cialdini

Influencers from Around the World – How NOT to Sell a Dishwasher

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This week you’ll read a funny story about how
not to sell. It comes to us all the way from Italy and is based on the real
life experience of Marco Germani. Marco has written guest posts for me for
about three years now. I think you’ll see humor in his situation and the value
a good salesperson can bring to customers. Along the way you’ll also get
several tips on how to be a better salesperson.
Brian, CMCT®
influencepeople 
Helping You Learn to Hear “Yes”.
How NOT to Sell a Dishwasher
A few weeks ago I went to a large household
appliance shop in Rome with the intention of buying a new dishwasher. I have
almost zero knowledge about this kind of machine but didn’t have time to perform
an accurate search on the Internet. Because I didn’t understand which would be
the best buy for me (among the dozens of models exhibited), I decided to rely
on the advice of the store clerk.
I approached the clerk with this question, “In
your opinion, which is the machine with the best quality/price ratio?” From this
point forward the guy presented himself in one of the worst sales performances
I have ever seen in my life. It was so bad I decided to write an article for
this blog about it. Let’s sum up the main mistakes he made:
1. MISTAKE: He asked no questions.
In reply to this question the clerk started to
list all the brands and models the store had in stock. He should have asked me
a few questions instead in order to better understand my specific needs in
terms of a dishwasher.
“Why are you buying a new machine today?”
“Did the old one failed and if so, why?”
“How often do you wash your dishes and how
many people in the household?”
There were some basic questions I expected him
to ask but he didn’t. It’s like going to the doctor and the doctor just starts
listing all the drugs available without first investigating your symptoms, Not
good!
2. MISTAKE: He was completely unprepared on
the products.
The machines available in the store ranged in
price from 300 to 1,500 Euro. While it was quite easy, even for the untrained
eye, to spot a difference between the most expensive machine and the cheapest
one, it was surely more tricky to understand the difference between a machine
of the same size, priced at 500 Euro vs. one priced at 650 Euro. At one point I
asked him about the difference between two machines, which happened to be the
same brand, that had an 85 Euro price difference. This should not be a
difficult question for somebody who makes a living out of selling these types
of appliances! His answer was, “I guess the more expensive one has more washing
programs.” I thought to myself, “You’re paid to guess rather than to provide
information.” Trying to go a bit deeper into the question I soon realized his
knowledge of the products was close to mine, which made him almost completely
useless.
3. MISTAKE: He presented the prices in the
wrong order.
Not knowing how to move forward, I tried a
different question, “Which one would you buy for your family?” He told me he
would have probably bought a Bosch machine priced 659 Euro or an Ariston
machine priced 779 Euro, or why not the Candy machine priced at 809 Euro. Had
he knew the basics about how to present a price, he would have started the list
with the most expensive one and he could have answered in the following way, “
I would surely buy the Candy, at 810 Euro. It definitely has the best
quality/price ratio and in 20 years it will work as smoothly as it does today.
I do understand, however, it is a bit on the expensive side so an alternative
might be the Ariston at 779 Euro because it’s a very good machine indeed. It’s close
in performances and consumption to the first one.” With this kind of
presentation, the 779 Euro of the Ariston would have appeared to be a good deal
had I not opted for the more expensive machine.
4. MISTAKE: He did not close the sale.
At this stage, I was seriously thinking about
leaving the store and going somewhere else so I told him I just wanted to think
about it. The guy said okay and left me there so he could “assist” another
customer. As he left he told me to call him if I needed him. Very bad! That’s absolutely
the best way to lose the sale. He should have asked something like, “Exactly, what
do you want to think about? Is it the price or something else?” He could have
asked, “Is there any way I can help you think about it? Do you need some
additional information?” In other words, you never want to leave your customer,
who already gave you buying signals, on his own before you even tried to close
the sale.
I really needed the machine (the old one
failed and washing dishes by the hand is not in the list of my favorite leisure
activities and my wife claims to be allergic to dish soap) so I ended up buying
a mid-priced machine and left feeling unsure as to whether or not I’d done the
right thing. With a more skilled clerk I probably would have spent more and
felt better about it. I wonder how much money that shop is losing every day
because of an incompetent salesman? Poor salesmen like the guy I encountered is
good news for those who study sales and the principles of persuasion. Studying
those two disciplines will help salespeople bring more value than a regular
store clerk who’s never spent time studying either subject and the end result
will be significantly better sales.
Marco Germani
mgermani@email.it

What’s Aristotle’s Best Persuasion Advice?

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Last week I quoted Aristotle in the post about Lance Armstrong. The great Greek philosopher, is credited with telling the world, “Character may almost be called the most effective means of persuasion.” I had a chance to see that up close and
personal not too long ago.

Many of you reading this may be familiar with the tragic story of Josh Brent and his late friend Jerry Brown. Jerry died in a car accident in December when Josh was behind the wheel. According to police reports, Josh’s blood alcohol level was twice the legal limit to be considered drunk. In an amazing act of kindness Stacey Brown, Jerry’s mother, forgave Josh and asked his Dallas Cowboys teammates to do the same.
On December 16 the Dallas Cowboys played the Pittsburgh Steelers in a nationally televised game and Josh Brent was shown on the sideline with his teammates. The Cowboys organization thought that was a way to
support Josh as he struggles with the reality of his actions. The American public didn’t see it that way and Facebook and Twitter lit up with comments asking how the Cowboys could do such a thing. I was among those who posted a comment because it was inconceivable to me that someone getting ready to go to court for the manslaughter of his best friend, while intoxicated, would be allowed on the sidelines, especially given the fact that the National Football League has had such a big problem with players and substance abuse.
Several people commented on my post and I made a joke that Josh’s next game will be as a prisoner in The Longest Yard 3. That’s when a friend, someone whom I respect very much, weighed in and wrote, “Jerry Brown’s mother has forgiven Josh. Please don’t dishonor her or her son with these comments. Thanks so much fellas.”
Immediately I was convicted. I still disagreed
with the decision by the Cowboys organization but my second comment was insensitive and my friend was 100% right. But what really made the difference for me was the respect I have for my friend. He didn’t need to do anything except share the truth and because of how he’s conducted his life it carried the weight of the world for me.
I deleted my original comment and the subsequent comments from my Facebook wall then sent a message to my friend to let him know I heard him, that I was wrong, and that the comment had been removed. He
replied as follows:
“My niece was killed by a drunk driver; my sister was maimed by a drunk driver, losing the use of her leg. I am adamantly opposed to drinking and driving. I can’t imagine what this young man will go
through knowing what he did to his best friend. My guess is that his teammates are just trying to help him get through it. You are a great friend and I know you would do the same for me if I screwed up like this; while still kicking my butt for being so stupid.”
I didn’t know this about my friend’s family history with drunk drivers. As I noted earlier, because of how my friend has conducted himself over the 20 years I’ve known him he had the right to set me straight. It never feels good to be called to the carpet but I’ve learned the best approach is to take Dale Carnegie’s advice – When you’re wrong admit it quickly and emphatically.
I teach people about the psychology of persuasion because I believe it’s a necessary tool for success and happiness. However, even if you don’t consider yourself an expert on the principles of
influence there’s another tool that’s completely within your control – your conduct, which builds or destroys your character. Do the right thing and you earn the right to speak into people’s lives because Aristotle was correct, “Character may almost be called the most effective means of persuasion.”

 

Brian, CMCT®
influencepeople 
Helping You Learn to Hear “Yes”.

Lance Armstrong, a Modern Day Robin Hood? Hell No!

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So last week, Lance Armstrong confessed to Oprah Winfrey that he did in fact use banned substances during his career. While this might be a surprise and disappointment to the general public, it wasn’t a shock to anyone inside the sport of cycling nor was it to most athletes. Whenever we see superhuman performances like winning the Tour de France seven times, Flo Jo smashing the 100-meter dash record by a half second, or Roger Clemons pitching at a Hall of Fame level well into his 40s, we should be very leery.

As I listened to Mike and Mike on ESPN radio driving to work they brought up the point that some people have equated Lance Armstrong to a modern day Robin Hood because he helped so many, despite breaking the rules. I say, “Hell no, he isn’t a modern day Robin Hood!”
First, Robin Hood was a fictional character. We see many fictional charters we wouldn’t tolerate in real life. Arnold Schwarzenegger plays some pretty cool action heroes in his movies but would we really tolerate such characters in the real world? Of course not, and it showed when his funny quips, best left for the movies or Saturday Night Live, got him in trouble on a number of occasions while governor of California. Remember the “girlie man” quote he made about budget opponents?
Robin Hood’s motive was all about helping the poor because they were oppressed by the local government and a corrupt sheriff. If you’ve followed Lance Armstrong over the years then you know Lance’s motive was Lance, pure and simple. With his notoriety he was able to help people but it was still about Lance, from the starting line to the finish line.
I heard one commentator say Lance knew he had to do this (confess), that he had no choice. He went on to say he also realizes it’s the right thing to apologize to those people whose lives he ruined. Did you notice it was about Lance first and the people he hurt second? If the right thing had been his motive then perhaps in the absence of the overwhelming evidence he would have approached those same people and apologized for what he’d done, then confessed to the world.
People have said, “But look at all the good he did.” Can’t the same be said for Joe Paterno when it comes to Penn State and their student athletes? Joe Pa had a very positive impact on both but this line of thinking is “the ends justifies the means.” In other words, it doesn’t matter what you do as long as you can point to how you helped others. Bernie Madoff donated millions to various organizations over the years and they benefited tremendously but did that make it right in terms of how he obtained his wealth? Ask the investors who paid his tab.
If there’s a silver lining for Lance Armstrong it’s twofold. First, he has advocates who will never leave him no matter what. Those people who benefitted from the LIVESTRONG foundation are among those. And don’t forget the millions he inspired to work hard at whatever their chosen profession or sport. When it came to inspiration he was like a real-life Rocky.
The second silver lining is the forgiveness of the American people based on the recency effect. Here’s a list of people who played their cards right and, while perhaps not attaining the same level of popularity and income they had prior to their scandals they’re still doing pretty well:
  • Tiger Woods is still the crowd favorite at PGA events.
  • Martha Stewart remains an icon for most homemakers.
  • Pete Rose might just make it into the Hall of Fame during his lifetime because of the legions of fans who believe it’s the right thing to do.

So what does all of this have to do with a blog on persuasion? Here are a couple of closing thoughts.

Aristotle said, “Character may almost be called the most effective means of persuasion.” Each of these people influenced legions of us to do things because of who we thought they were. Had we known the truth many of us might have made different choices on what to do with our time, money, effort, and adoration.
When I write about persuasion my bent is ethical persuasion because none of us wants to be manipulated nor do we want to be known as manipulators.  If something is the right thing to do then we shouldn’t have to resort to manipulation to get people to do what we want.
Let me leave you with this; Frank Sinatra sang, “I did it my way” and there’s a part of the “pull yourself up by the bootstraps” American mentality that loves this.  That is, until we find out someone’s “way” is to cheat and manipulate, because in the end the ends DOESN’T justify the means. If you want to look yourself in the mirror and feel good about who you are, do the right thing.
Brian, CMCT®
influencepeople 
Helping You Learn to Hear “Yes”.

Some Problems with American Politics

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I spent a good bit of time before New Year’s
flipping between CNN, MSNBC and Fox News to find out about the progress being
made on the “fiscal cliff” talks. The more I thought about that fiasco the more
I decided to share my view of the problems in American politics.
The average American seems to understand much
more than our elected officials. Married people know if you want a marriage to
work you need to learn to compromise. For the most part the ability to
compromise is seen as a good thing in life – except with our politicians.
In order to get out of the primaries,
representatives have to pander to the extreme elements in their party. That
means politicians take a hard line on many issues. They soften only slightly in
the general election with a goal of winning over as many undecided voters as
possible because neither party has such a stronghold that they can rely solely
on their base to get them elected.
Once the elected officials get to Washington
they’re beholden to those who elected them and the extreme positions they
espoused. The principle of consistency, the psychological
trait that tells us people want to be consistent in word and deed, makes it
difficult for politicians to move from their original positions even if new
data dictates that doing so would be best for the majority of Americans.
Despite what we learned about democracies and
majority rule it’s never that simple because of procedural rules that allow
each party to bring things to a halt or a snail’s pace. While there are good
reasons for these rules, they seem to be abused by both sides and the result is
the gridlock we’ve seen in Washington for far too long.
Another issue is the mentality politicians
seem to have about re-election. It’s almost the same mentality American businesses
now have about quarterly earnings. Businesses can be so focused on the
short-term that they make bad long-term decisions. For example, too often
companies don’t make needed investments in things like technology in order to keep
expenses low and boost quarterly earnings which makes the stock price look good.
In the same way politicians seem to do what’s best for them in the short-term
(i.e., get re-elected) as opposed to the long-term good of the country.
Personally I think term limits would help alleviate
this to some degree.
Lastly, I’ll share what I call “the law of the
gym.” When I was just out of college I was competing in bodybuilding contests.
My weight was around 225 lbs. and I would diet down to about 195 lbs. for
competitions. I quickly learned I could not burn enough calories through
exercise alone to lose those 30 lbs. In fact, exercising too much would
eventually be counter-productive to my goal. To put this in perspective,
consider this – running two miles burns approximately 250 calories or the
equivalent of a Snickers bar. Which is easier to do, run two miles or skip the
candy bar? It was obvious I needed to restrict my diet in certain ways. The
good news was, between the exercise and dieting I was always able to reach my
goal weight.
Let’s apply “the law of the gym” to politics
and our current debt situation. Tax revenues are like exercise; we can’t raise
them enough to get out of debt and raising them too much could actually hurt us
if jobs are lost. Our nation needs to go on a diet – spending cuts – in addition
to our exercise – recent tax increases. To go on spending as we are will only
cause the debt to grow. Hopefully our politicians can reach some compromise and
start reducing government spending so the debt begins to come down.
And speaking of the debt, we’ve become desensitized
to how large it’s become. Hundreds of millions, billions and trillions are
figures that no longer cause us to bat an eye. Only when you compare and contrast the debt to something
can you begin to wrap your mind around it, so here’s a comparison point for
you.  If you spent $1 million a day since
the time of the Egyptian empire you would only pay off a trillion dollars of our
debt. More than 2,700 years at a million dollars a day hardly makes a dent!
Now consider our national debt at roughly $16
trillion. If we could pay it down by $1 million a day it would take us more than 48,000 years to pay it off!
When politicians talk about it being immoral to pass on our debt to the next
generation that’s not as big a problem as passing our debt on to  thousands of generations! How would you feel if we were still paying down the
debt of the ancient Egyptians or Romans?
I no longer consider myself an affiliate of
either party because neither represents my views any longer. There are elements
of each that I agree with but there’s so much with both that I disagree with
that I can’t consider myself a Republican or a Democrat. It’s my hope that
sometime during my lifetime we get a third or fourth alternative to choose from
because right now most of us find ourselves choosing between the lesser of two
evils.
Brian, CMCT®
influencepeople 
Helping You Learn to Hear “Yes”.

Persuasion Can Double Your Results at Half the Cost!

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It’s a new year and that means a fresh start. The profit and sales measures have all been reset to zero and the sky is the limit. If I could share with you a proven persuasion technique that could potentially double your results at half the cost would you be interested?

Most businesses use rewards to stimulate the desired results. That’s not bad business but there’s a more cost effective way that can help you get better results. How, you ask? By engaging people with gifts instead of rewards.
Rewards are based on an “if you, I will” system whereas gifts are simply “I will.” You see, a gift given does not
necessarily mean the other person will do what you want. We only need to look at charitable organizations like Easter Seals or March of Dimes to realize not everyone donates to those causes. However, if those two organizations are like the American Veterans they probably see twice as many people donate because of those little mailing labels – gifts – we receive in the mail.
When people are given a gift they feel compelled to give back in some way. We call that tendency “reciprocity.” I often share a reciprocity study in workshops that makes business owners sit up and take notice.
A health insurance company wanted owners of construction companies to take a health insurance survey. Half of the owners
were told they’d be given $50 when they completed and returned the completed survey. That’s pretty generous! The other owners were given a $5 check up front with a short note letting them know their time was valuable and thanked them for taking the survey.
On the surface most people would conclude two
things:

  1. Those being offered $50 will be far more likely to take the survey. After all,
    the incentive is 10 times more.
  2. Giving $5 up front will be too costly, especially because people can “take the money and run” and skip completing the
    survey.
If you thought either of those, you were wrong on both accounts. What they found was more than twice as many people took the survey when given the $5 check (52% vs. 23%) and the cost savings was potentially huge. If every person receiving the $5 check cashed it, the insurance company would have still saved 57%, but if only those who completed the survey cashed
it, the savings would have been 77%!
You don’t need to be a mathematician or have much business savvy to know more than doubling your results at a savings of more than 50%, possibly as much as 77%, makes good business sense.
Why do we see such a phenomenal result? Because reciprocity, the need we all feel to give back, is ingrained in us from
our earliest memories. As soon as we’re able to speak, mom and dad taught us to say “thank you” when someone did something for us. As we got older we learned more sophisticated ways to repay our obligations.
Next time you feel tempted to motivate someone with a big reward pause and consider whether or not there’s a way to give something significantly less and still get the desired behavior. It’s a new year so what better way to kick it off than by doubling your results at half the cost!

 

Brian, CMCT®
influencepeople 
Helping You Learn to Hear “Yes”.

Influencers from Around the World – Real World Persuasion in Selling

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To start the New Year our Influencers from Around the World guest post comes to us by way of Ireland from my good friend Sean Patrick. Sean owns a sales training company, Sales Training Evaluation. He  came to the States in October 2010 to spend a week with me and attended the Principles of Persuasion workshop I hosted. You can connect with Sean on Facebook, LinkedIn and Twitter.

Brian, CMCT® 
influencepeople 
Helping You Learn to Hear “Yes”.

Real World Selling
As a reader of Brian Ahearn’s blog, you’ve come to expect to read mostly about Robert Cialdini’s principles of persuasion. This post is slightly different, as I’ll be talking about some fanciful tactical elements that can make up a potent mix and get more people to say “Yes” more often.
You’ve probably read it somewhere that people buy from people and people trust people that appear similar to themselves. The next time you are solving a personal crisis with a friend or about to go and pitch to a new customer, how about understanding those people first? Do your research and find out as much about that person as possible. Learn out about their past, their likes, dislikes, as well as their personal and professional milestones. You can actually find a lot of this information just by using a strong Boolean search in Google, by reading press releases and other material such as presentations and white papers, and more importantly by “listening” to that person on social media. This gives you an advantage because you’ll understand what motivates that person.
We all have fears, whether it’s fear of putting on weight, missing deadlines, death, inflation, debt, the unknown, and growing old. From a young age, we’ve been coached into making prejudices about our decisions by making cross-references between our past and current experiences. Fear, uncertainty and doubt make us think irrationally and can be powerful enough to drive us into making decisions that are negative as well as positive. If we make negative decisions such as taking up smoking, there is usually a positive intention behind the original decision, and that positive intention could be to help us get some relief from stress. This is what’s known as secondary gain.
If we go back to our fears just for a moment, think about the decisions to buy life insurance and invest in pension funds. We buy expensive gym memberships because of a fear of putting on weight; we buy home security products because we fear for the integrity of our home and possessions. Our first lesson here is to think about the underlying motivators that cause us to make decisions because a lot of our decision-making isn’t logically grounded but rather, can be very irrational.
One way of looking at this is to view your decisions in two groups: away from and towards. For example, we move away from our fears and we move towards things we love. But think about why we either fear or love. This is a huge motivator and can wreak havoc on unsuspecting customers and cause great profit from vendors.
How do you perceive value and ask yourself what does value mean to you? When you’re selling or trying to get a friend or associate to buy into your idea, think in terms of what value you can offer to help sweeten the deal. Value comes in two different types: personal value and business value. Let’s take a look at personal value first. Think about all those times when you volunteered information nuggets gratis (or free). What happened? More than likely, the recipient profited in some way. This is called personal value and most of the time, you give this away too cheaply. As a law abiding and decent citizen, your mother brought you up to share things with other people. This is a lovely gesture but charitable acts such as sharing in the business world will leave you feeling punished and dejected. Never share your candy too soon.
Business value is slightly different. You show this type of value by demonstrating your capability in a way that is unique to you. This differentiates you and lessens the likelihood of being commoditized by a buying officer. You can offer business value by selling a $10 lunch for $ 7.99 but is that going to be enough? Certainly not for everyone. Real business value is doing something utterly different that allows you to create your own rules and profit from them because no one else can offer the same product or service as you. For example, Apple rode out financial turbulence by moving away (think of motivators here) from debt and making profit by creating remarkable products that weren’t available anywhere else. Or were they? Similar products were available but Apple went a step further, they created unique enhancements to increase the user experience, which increased its products’ value exponentially.
Finally, think of our motivators again back at the beginning of this post. This time let’s turn those inside out. This is called expectation. When we buy expensive gym memberships we expect to receive help in getting fit and losing weight. When we buy life insurance we expect to insulate ourselves against our loved ones being left high and dry financially. You get the picture.
This is yet another way of thinking about benefits, those by-products we experience positively via our purchases. We want results and solutions to our problems and that’s exactly what we expect when make those purchases. Whenever you’re embarking on a persuasion process with someone, think about how the other person can benefit from your idea and tell him or her exactly what he or she can expect. If you find this tough to do, ask that person a series of questions to find out what they want, then match what you can deliver that gives them a solution and then tell them precisely what they can expect.
Sean

PAVE Your Way to Success in the New Year

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If you’re like many people then you’ll be making New Year’s resolutions shortly. And if you’re like most people you’ll be breaking those resolutions within days. In one study, 52% of people making resolutions were confident of achieving them, yet only 12% actually did so. It’s a shame because most of the goals people set are good ones! Here are some of the most popular New Year’s resolutions people make:

  • Spend more time with family
  • Lose weight
  • Start exercising
  • Quit smoking
  • Quit drinking
  • Get organized
  • Get out of debt

The list is admirable so why are these goals so difficult to achieve for the vast majority of people? There are probably as many reasons as there are resolutions, but we don’t need to spend time on them because you’ve probably heard just about all of them…and perhaps even used a few yourselves! As I’ve done in years past I’m going to share an influence technique that can help you PAVE the way to success in the New Year.

In the study of persuasion there’s a powerful motivator of behavior known as “consistency.” This principle says that people feel compelled to act in ways that are consistent with their prior actions, words, deed, beliefs and values. When we act in consistently we feel better about ourselves and people perceive us in a more favorable light, which adds to our authority.
We are going to take a look at consistency as it pertains to you and four simple things to strengthen its power in your life. These simple ideas will PAVE the way to your success because they’ll dramatically increase the odds that you’ll follow through on your New Year’s resolutions.
Public – Any time you make a public statement, whether verbally or in writing, you’re putting yourself on the line. The mere fact that another person knows your intention and might ask you how you’re coming along with your commitment is quite often enough motivation for people to follow through. Recommendation #1 – Share with another person or group of people, your New Year’s resolution and ask them to hold you accountable.
Active – You have to actively do something. Merely thinking about a resolution, just keeping it to yourself, will lead to the same results as people who don’t make resolutions. In other words, nothing will change. This came to light in a study with a group of students who wanted to improve their college grades. One group was asked to write their goals down, one group kept their goals in their heads, and the last group had no specific goal whatsoever. As you can imagine, the group with the written goals succeeded, with nearly 90% of students increasing by a full letter grade! With the other two groups the results were almost identical. In each group fewer than 1 in 6 students improved a full letter grade. It’s worth noting, they were all given the same study materials so they all had the same opportunity. Recommendation #2 – Make sure you have to take some active step. It could be as simple as buying a book to help you learn more about the changes you’re hoping to make.
Voluntary – This has to be YOUR goal, not someone else’s goal for you. If you’re trying to do something – quit smoking, lose weight, get in shape – it’s not likely your motivation will last if someone told you to do it. The goal has to come from you because if it’s forced on you it’s not likely your desire will last long. Samuel Butler said it best when he wrote, “He who complies against his will is of the same opinion still.” Recommendation #3 – Make sure it’s something you want to do.
Effortful – It was noted above that you have to actively do something. In other words, making the commitment should require some effort on your part. In fact, the more effort you expend setting up your goal, the more likely you are to succeed. Something as simple as writing down your resolution can make a difference, even if you don’t share it with anyone. But, taking the time to share it also fulfills the public requirement, which gives you more bang for the buck! Dr. Robert Cialdini puts it this way, “People live up to what they write down.” Recommendation #4 – Commit pen to paper and you’ll increase your chance for success significantly.
None of what I just shared is new but I’m willing to bet many of you have not tried the PAVE technique before. If you’ve been one to make resolutions in the past only to fail, then give this different approach a try. If you fail again you’re no worse off but this different approach might just be your key to success in 2013. Good luck and Happy New Year to all of you!

Brian, CMCT®
influencepeople 
Helping You Learn to Hear “Yes”.

Knowing Your Audience is a Key to Persuasion

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In late October, I was in Arizona to address the Arizona School Administrators on the science of influence. Jane and I went out early to enjoy the weekend in Scottsdale and spend time with friends. During our stay we had the good fortune to share lunch with Robert Cialdini, PhD., and his wife. The morning we were to dine, while on the treadmill, I pondered what we might talk about and what gem I might take away from our time together. In the midst of that run I came up with my own gem.
Understanding the science of influence isn’t a magic wand and it’s certainly no guarantee you’ll get everyone to do what you want. There are still plenty of times when I don’t get the response I want and even the master himself, Dr. Cialdini, doesn’t always get what he wants.
As the treadmill sped under my feet and my mind raced along I thought about a story Dr. Cialdini shares quite often when he speaks. Many years ago he was a member of a gym and one day he happened to lock his keys and wallet in the trunk of his car upon arriving at the gym. He asked Paul, the guy folding towels behind the front desk, if he could use the gym’s phone and was promptly told no. He persisted, explaining his situation and reminding Paul he’d been a member of the gym for years and that surely Paul recognized him. Paul didn’t budge from his original answer because of a bad experience with another member who abused the phone privilege the week before. Dr. Cialdini announced, “You’ve just lost a customer,” and walked out. Despite his best effort he was no better off and had to panhandle a quarter in order to call someone to come help him out.
A couple of principles of influence were at play in the conversation – liking and scarcity. Liking was at work because of Dr. Cialdini’s and Paul’s familiarity with each other. The connection obviously wasn’t strong enough because it didn’t persuade Paul to let him use the phone.
Scarcity was at play because Dr. Cialdini let Paul know he stood to lose something, a long-term customer. This didn’t move Paul either because he still didn’t allow him to use the phone.
As I thought about this it took me back to my day job – sales training with State Auto Insurance. In sales we place a lot of emphasis on knowing your customer because they’re not all alike and different things motivate different people. For example, at independent insurance agencies, a field rep wouldn’t want to talk about winning trips and earning a bonus to customer service reps because they usually don’t get to enjoy those awards. In fact, talking about those things can cause resentment. Understanding what motivates the CSRs then tailoring communications using the principles of influence will be far more effective.
Back to Dr. Cialdini and Paul. It’s my guess that Paul was probably a minimum wage guy and wasn’t about to possibly get in trouble by allowing anyone to use the phone after getting an earful from his boss the week before. Dr. Cialdini, likely caught up in the emotion of the moment, announced the gym would lose a customer but even that didn’t matter to Paul because it’s doubtful his pay was tied to customer retention. He was paid to follow the rules and guidelines.
So what could Dr. Cialdini have done differently? Setting emotions aside and understanding his audience might have changed his actions. Perhaps there was nothing that was going to get Paul to change on the phone issue but recognizing Dr. Cialdini as a gym member he could have allowed him inside where Dr. Cialdini might have used someone’s cell phone or borrowed a quarter from a familiar face. Either option would have been better than panhandling strangers to get the needed quarter.
I first heard this story many years ago and I’m not sure why it came to the surface at this time but whatever the reason, we should all be encouraged. Even the master fails sometimes so we should never let failure deter us. The right response should be to learn from the situation and resolve to try a different approach the next time. Do so and soon you’ll find yourself successfully persuading more often than not and that will lead to more professional success and personal happiness.
Brian, CMCT® 
influencepeople 
Helping You Learn to Hear “Yes”.

Influencers from Around the World – I Can vs I Did

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Most of you long time readers of Influence PEOPLE know Hoh Kim because of his many guest posts to the Influencers from Around the World series. Hoh is also a Cialdini Method Certified Trainer (CMCT) and has his masters in communication from Marquette University. You can find out more about Hoh by visiting his website, The Lab h, and his blog, Cool Communications. You can connect with Hoh on LinkedIn, Facebook and Twitter. 
Brian, CMCT 
influencepeople 

Helping You Learn to Hear “Yes”.

I Can vs. I Did 

What
are the key differences between more influential people and less influential
people?

I
participated in the Principles of Persuasion (POP) workshop in 2005. Then, I was trained by Dr. Robert Cialdini to be Cialdini Method Certified Trainer (CMCT) in 2008. Since then I have facilitated the two-day (16 hours) POP workshop more than 20 times. Sometimes, I meet some of the past participants of my workshop and discuss how they have used the principles of influence.
People
who participate in the POP workshop learn the scientific research and practical
application of the six principles of influence, which come from Dr. Robert Cialdini’s lifetime research. Even people who never participated in the workshop or read his book would be familiar with one or some of the Cialdini’s principles, like scarcity; people want more of what they can have less of, or authority, which says that people defer to experts.
But still, even after learning all the principles and tools, there are differences and some people become much more influential while others don’t. What makes the differences?
I
came to realize there are two types (or levels) of “educated” people: those who say, “I can do it,” vs. those who can say, “I did it.”
  1. “I can do it.”

    2. People get various sources of influence/persuasion; from books, advice from experts, school, seminars or workshop like POP, and so on. Let’s assume that you read the right books, got the right advice, and attended the right classes, seminars, or workshops on influence and persuasion. Once people learn the principles and techniques, they are in the level of “I can do it.” This is a level of possibilities and knowledge. For example, all the POP workshop participants can reach this level. Education and training can put the knowledge into your head but you need more than just that in order to become more influential. You have to move from “I can do it” to “I did it.”

  1. “I did it.”

    2. Over and over, year after year, I found that previous participants of my workshop who have reported they became much more influential and negotiated better outcomes for themselves share one important factor. They said “I did what I learned – at least one or some of the principles and techniques.” These people are in the level of practice (not just possibilities) and action (not just knowledge). They not only have the knowledge in their heads but they actually take actions with their hands.

Less Influential
More Influential
I
can do it
I
did it
Knowledge
Action
Possibilities
Practices
Head
Hand
The
last slide of my POP workshop says, “All know the ways, few actually walk it.” This is a quote from Bodhidharma, a Buddhist monk who lived during the 5th/6th century. The more I think about this quote, the more I come to believe its truth. For example, I know how to lose weight; i.e., eat less, exercise more. But, simply knowing that doesn’t mean I walk the way.
These
days, we can learn all those “ways” from the Internet and skip school, seminars and workshops. In most cases, the reason we fail to do something is not because we don’t know the way, but because we don’t walk the way we know.
So,
here’s a little tip for all of us as we are approaching Christmas and year-end. This is the opportunity to “practice” the principles of liking and reciprocity.
  1. Allocate at least one “uninterrupted” half-day in December (I allocated two full days for this).
  2. Review your calendar/schedules or business cards/your contact list. Select 30-50 people you really want to thank in the year of 2012.
  3. Write
    down short messages via cards, emails, or even text messages for them. You have to be specific in what you thank them for, not just “thank you for your help!” Praise them as appropriate. For some of the people, you can send little gifts.

For
the year 2013, let us “walk the way” not just “know the way.” 

Hoh, CMCT

Does Your Audience Know You’re an Authority?

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Earlier this year I spoke at The Ohio State University to a few dozen business coaches where I shared some insight on
Robert Cialdini’s principles of influence and their application to the coaching process.
In this short video I briefly explore the principle of authority, which tells us people look to those with superior knowledge and expertise when they’re not 100% certain about what they should do. When you want to persuade people having them know something about your expertise up front can sometimes make all the difference.

If you’re viewing this post by email click here for the video.

Are you looking for a keynote speaker, training, or consulting on how to apply scientifically proven principles of
influence to your sales, marketing, management or leadership? If so, reach out to me (BFA654@gmail.com or 614.313.1663) and we’ll talk about your specific needs.

Brian, CMCT 
influencepeople 
Helping You Learn to Hear “Yes”.